My bad married life

Hi shari,

Am also in the same boat as yours but in a much worser situation as I never had any of these so called marital happiness ever since I got married. Problems are attacking me from all possible direction. Career, living alone, in laws problem, parents health, staying away from hubby since marriage, no plans for future, children and it just goes. There had been plenty of nights I had cried badly for this twist in my destiny but what makes me move on is the hope that this too shall pass away.
I also do skype chatting & talk on phone thats it..God did not allow me to be with H even in this most crucial foundation period of life. In your case you are secured & have two beautiful kids to share your time, happiness with. If you are unhappy it would have a impact on the kids who are already missing their dad. Dont ever feel that you are bad wife or mom. You are doing your level best to maintain the balance. Actually its a good thing that you miss your hubby and this is going to increase your love by many folds. There are many out there who dont even miss their spouses and lead a life for themselves. Coming to functions people put their happy faces on compulsion. We really dont know what actually are they going through. So chill
To distract yourself you can plan some vacation with kids, visit your parents, skype chat with hubby whenver time permits. Be happy, pleasant & do somr activities together online be it eating, playing with kids whatever.
I bet you wont be in the same ranting mood all time. Its just a phase. Everything will be fine..Dont worry be happy

 

Dear OP,

Since you mentioned you have a 4 month old, did you get yourself checked for postpartum depression? Esp in your case, in appears like you seem to live alone just with the kids, is it possible to have your parents live with you for a short while?

 

Yours is not a bad married life. Marriage is more than physical proximity.

It can be frustrating on many levels to stay physically apart. Remember that it is temporary.set a fixed date before which either he returns or you join him.

You both seem to love and cherish each other and this period of separation would only strenghten your relation. Being together physically but poles apart in mind is much worse than being temporarily apart physically but longing for each other.

 

I can see ur living with all the faclities of this world with good financial background .. think abt the ppl who still cant able to meet their basic needs and struggling abroad for better tomorrow.. also cant able to call two times a day .. thats the real genuine saperation.. ur case is different .. since both are working then if love is more priority then can unite and find the job together .. else the future of kids is more important so needs to sacifice some thing to get some thing

 

I believe ..it is not possible to have everything in life...at least not in a short period of time .You get to choose what you want and what you can live without. You both have made some choices keeping your preferences in mind.

 

It's strange people take their biggest gamble in something so very important in their lives like marriage. I am not by any means hinting of doing away with marriage. But is there no credible alternative to marriage in maintaining relations between the sexes?