Office Ladies troubling me mentally !!!!

Above suggestion is good...Put family photos in ur cabin...and few drawings made by ur kids...That way u will convey the impression that u are a family man...Also whenever u are in a conversation with any of ur colleagues male/ female keep talking about your wife and praising her...Again and again u can mention how understanding she is and how sensible she is compared to other women these days...Atleast some ladies may get discouraged after hearing all this and will leave u alone.

 

Hi dhruva19,

Okay, so you're into a teaching profession, if I'm not wrong. Great ! I guess, this one is the most noble profession of all, primarily because its a profession with huge respect.

What you have talked about in your post is work dynamics. The main reason for this is that you're young and holds an important position in your office. Definitely, ladies around you would intentionally try to come close to you to gain something in their career. This is no rocket science. You and me, both know it, that these ladies are trying to come closer to you because they know, you can help them alot in their career.

But sir, you need to understand, office is a work place and you're a married man. These two things are enough for you to put limitations and draw a boundary around yourself. Being married, doesn't give you the liberty to get too close with someone of opposite sex. And, being in an professional environment, limits you to behave thorough professionally.

Let the ladies behave as they want to be. It's your working place, its your career, and I'm sure you wouldn't like to hamper it in anyway by turning out rude to them or creating a scene in your office. You never know, who might prove helpful to you at what time. So, lets preserve the healthy relationships for our own good.

Now, what you can do is, set a boundary for yourself. Since you're the HOD of the department, there's definitely a decency and decorum you have to maintain. Things depend on how you project yourself.
Being the HOD, if you're too cool and smiling to other staff members, then this sweet nature might create problems for you. Maintain a somewhat serious attitude...a confined one. This will help in a way that these ladies will feel a sense of hesitation when trying to approach you.

Second, as generic suggested above, keep photos of your wife and kids in your personal cabin/cubical. Let others know how much you love your family. Give them clear, but indirect indication that their efforts are going in vain.

Third, meet them in public. Avoid having any personal meetings in cabin or cubical. Maintain some distance but don't loose your politeness to safeguard your professional relationships.

Kindly, do your own work. Engross yourself in lectures and/or other stuffs. Project as if you're hyper busy. These ladies in question, will think twice or thrice before approaching you for something stupid or a casual conversation. No need to be extra sweet.

Also, concentrate on your work and do not let your brain wander or think too much about who's behaving and how.
You have perhaps made too close observations. It seems to me that you're constantly thinking about these signs and trying to observe them too closely.

In a later stage, when your wife is here. you can introduce her to these ladies to put a full stop to everything at once.

Don't worry. Things will be fine in no time. It's all in your hands and depends on your understanding.

 

It is better to get your seat changed or try for a transfer to blore and stay with your family if your job is a transferrable one.

 

its good to know you are a loyal guy.... Give the ladies a stern look and IGnore.. keep your self respect and dignity the way you are maintaing now. When woman act weird to you.. just walk away with the phone as if u had to make a call to ur wife /kid

 

Hearthealer gave you very good suggestions and i agree with his explanations of the situation. In your position it is important to make a reputable, serious-minded impression, so be polite but dont overdo and think you owe them something. they most probably sneak arround you 1. coz they hope you can be helpfull with their carerr and 2. coz some women simply like powerfull men. Second one are the ones you should be really carefull with and stay away. Show selfconfident and make it a point to draw your borderlines, you are in the position to do so.

 

Be serious in your work place and do not act friendly with especially ladies. That should do some help in keeping ladies in their limits.

Praising wife and talking of kids often will also put them off.

Next time any lady bumps into you repeatedly, aak her in serious tone "well, you seem to be bumping into me too often. Is there anything you wanna say?"

 

this type of activities do happen in many IT companys ..could be to get a promotion or better appraisal .. some ppl get into such traps and some ppl make use of it nicely .. so you need to more strict and can command over their action if its not pleasing u any time.. since ur a lead so easily canhandle it and also dont give so much attention to it ..do u r work and show professional ethics ..they after some time will leave since not gaining any

 

Maybe I am the odd one out here, I didn't think any of the mentioned incidents by itself can be termed as inappropriate. There could be innocent explanation for it. It is possible some of the ladies wanting to be friendly but the same could be said about your male colleagues, I am sure.


All I am saying is there could be an innocent explanation for all, unless someone crosses the line, it is better to give them the benefit of doubt. In a work environment head of dept or not, it is better to be friendly & professional to people who work with us. It is good to be cautious about hidden motives of both male and female colleagues but better not to over analyse and spoil our own peace of mind.