If this happened, what would you do?

I am having trouble with my husband's behavior. Can you please tell me whether I am overacting. I will specify a few instances. I feel disrespected by him. He thinks it is fun.

1. Other day we went out to to buy groceries, he saw a pretty girl and he started oogling at her. He told me he found his life partner (that girl in the grocery store). I ignored it. Then again he was staring at her and was saying since he likes her she is like my sister. We went to the other aisle and she was in another aisle, he said that I should go looking for her and asked me where is my sister. I dont know who that girl is? I feel agonized at this behavior. He does not think this is wrong, he thinks it is fun and justifies that all men do this

2. He knows my facebook pwd and id. He browses through my friends list and one of my friend is very pretty and she had posted her photos which came up in my newsfeed. He saw those photos and he was pestering me to introduce her to him (my husband). When I asked why should I introduce her, he said his friend is looking for a marriage alliance so he thought my friend (girl on facebook) would be a good fit. In reality my husband does not have any unmarried friends and no one is looking for an alliance. It is my husband who just wanted to friend her.

3. One of my neighbor in India was very pretty, she was married. My husband was hitting at her. My husband told me it would be great to have my neighbor as his second wife. I asked what about me? He said he will take care of me as well so that I can take care of my child and he can enjoy on the bed with her (my neighbor). It's been 5 years since I left India and I got to know through common friends that my neighbor got divorced. My husband tries to locate her profile online and I don't know if he has found her profile or not.

These are just few of the many instances I face with him day in and day out. I face this in the shopping mall, grocery store you name it. For all this, he says he only talks and those talks will never be his actions. Can I trust him


Not a single day has he told me I look beautiful. He only keeps looking at other girls and this really affects my self esteem. Usually after arguments, I cry a lot and after years of crying, these days it is affecting my health and sometimes I become incoherent for hours after crying. Is he treating me like trash or am I expecting too much. please help my mind is very cluttered.

 

Ladies thanks for replying. Even I thought if I admire other men he will learn his lesson - but to no avail. He uses that as an argument point to continue ogling, like he says you also look at men so why I have a problem if he looks at women.

When I tell him I have not seen other men do so, he replies back saying other men would be doing so in front of their wives, so I wouldn't know about it.

today I told him how I feel about it, he argued and argued and never accepted he was wrong. He is not talking to me now. He wants me to take it as fun.

he gets jealous when I look at movie heroes and he picks out flaws in them. He suspects me of having an affair even if I buy nice clothes or make up. He asks me for who am I getting such make up. I work and I,ll be facing customers so I need to buy make up to look good during presentations. In US good dressing matters a lot.


I am financially independent but also dependent on him for my child. I don't get many work from home options and my work requires me to travel, so that time I have to depend on my husband to take care of the child.