Feeling jealous when husband compliments other women

enfinity · May 21, 2013

I know this is trivial but been eating me up.

My husbands compliments other women a lot be it their looks or cooking...
It's not normal compliments like hey the food tastes great.. But he will say it with so much emphasis... This is the food to die for.. Ur stunning..

Occasionally I do get those compliments... But I feel very jealous when he says it to other women .. Now how do I react??? Or handle myself?

Irfana3300 · May 21, 2013

U can also do the same. Give compliments to other guys, means ur friends, neighbours or cousins or any gentleman related to ur family. say they are so Gentle and handsome than ur husband. When he saying about other women u never show ur feelings in ur face, just a pleasant face only. Make him realize that it won't affecting u. It will never hurt u. I think he will also feel jealous when u give compliments to other men. this is the good revenge.........try.....

flowerlady · May 21, 2013

Tell him that you feel uncomfortable when he goes overboard with his compliments. Its a difficult habit to break, he must be the life of the party!
Its a difficult situation if DH does it often.
If this fails try complimenting other men like suggested in the earlier post .

sumanrathi · May 21, 2013

why don't you take this in positively and improve your skills this will make your hubby happy

JazzyJazz · May 21, 2013

You can probably try explaining in a subtle way that it makes you feel a lil low types but don't make it appear that you doubt him or something like that, that will become a diff topic altogether. I sometimes give that proper Tit-for-tat situation, if my DH admires certain heroines I also admire some heroes openly so he gets a feel of how I felt that time, however we both don't compare with any real life ppl. DH did it once and he realized I got upset and stopped.

RadiantFlower · May 21, 2013

Irfana3300 said: ↑

U can also do the same. Give compliments to other guys, means ur friends, neighbours or cousins or any gentleman related to ur family. say they are so Gentle and handsome than ur husband. When he saying about other women u never show ur feelings in ur face, just a pleasant face only. Make him realize that it won't affecting u. It will never hurt u. I think he will also feel jealous when u give compliments to other men. this is the good revenge.........try.....
Click to expand...

This strategy doesn't work all the time.

Be careful, it can even backfire on you - the older sis of someone I know tried this once with her hubby who instead of getting jealous, began accusing her of having a 'loose character' and a 'filthy' mind.

Now she's facing two problems, instead of one.

msid · May 21, 2013

sometimes guys do that just to make u jealous, So that you ll giv extra attention to him...

Just say it straight that its making u uncomfortable... He ll understand

enfinity · May 21, 2013

Thanks all for your responses dear friends...

Irfana -
I haven't yet learnt the art of showing a pleasant face.. My face gives out my inner thoughts.. So having trouble there. Also he is very good looking..And i dont look that good. And because of the way he talks and moves with the crowd and his looks, wherever we go all will be interested to talk to him and he also enjoys the attention.. I will be left out and would end up listening to his praises about other women.

Some of these praises would be uncalled for.. Something maybe good/average.. But my husband would showcase as though that is the best thing in the world and he has never come across anything like that before..

Now how do i react when some of these are for women in the family - like sister in law, cousins, sister etc?
I'm also not sure friends, how will i tell this to him straight???

SumanRathi - Like i said if its something so good that i need to adapt it - yes, but someone made normal cabbage subzi and he said awesome, mindblowing - you rock!! rather than a simple - its good.

Flowerlady - He uses such complements like normal things like i said above. And yes you are right, he wants to be the life of the party.. I get completely ignored in the process, but again he doesnt care. i will keep a straight face and get ignored by rest also..

meenurani · May 21, 2013

Openly discuss with him about it.

guesshoo · May 21, 2013

Hello OP,

I've come across a couple of people like your DH. It is their nature to be the centre of attention and they have been. They neither mean harm nor mischief. It is not right to want to change someone's nature - more so because it usually is futile. Your DH's characteristic is a good thing. You say he compliments your too - which shows he isn't being maliciously two-faced. It is not fair to ask your DH to come to the sidelines because of the reasons you have stated.

All of us are given the faces we have. There is nothing we can do about it. However, more than the looks we were born with, it is our personality which makes us shine. If we take care of our appearance, dress with care and learn to make conversation, there is nothing to stop us from being admired too. In this age of the internet, it is really easy to find articles to improve social skills. I suggest that you work on your self esteem and improving social skills. Practice your facial expressions in front of the mirror. That helps a LOT, I've personally found. If you work towards maintaining a pleasant look on your face and readily smiling at people, you should be able to get into conversations.

And remember, he may compliment other women. Yet you are the one he married, is living with and will be leaving the party with! If it helps, be proud of that. The more secure you are of yourself, the better you will be able to appreciate this quality of his...

Cheers,
G