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husband never gives me any gifts for any occasion...breaks my heart :(

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by priya2782, Feb 7, 2013.

  1. ShilpaMa

    ShilpaMa IL Hall of Fame

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    My bday after marriage ... returns 11 pm from office.. stmch upset want to eat khichdi :bonk
    My 2nd Bday ... took him to a jwellery shop... made him swipe his card... he was sweating and needed 2 glasses of lemonade. :bonk:bonk

    My bday after delivery... I got a stuffed Cow ... maybe becos I smelled like 1.

    Bday / valentine following .... a stuffed heart with a ping pong keychain :bonk.

    Lately things have improved after his much yngr cousins got married and their PDA on facebook.
    Recommendation : Its DNA... clubbed with influence/ learnings/ teachings. Swipe yourself whenever u can... and mostly with his add on card... I still don't have his ;-)
     
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  2. smritisinha

    smritisinha Platinum IL'ite

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    After pulling long faces in front of him many times when friends talk about gifts from spouses, when cousins talk about gifts from spouses, my DH, NOW keeps his ears open.

    Any time I say "Hey, that nail colour is cool na?" I see a twinkle in his eyes. And I see a packet in his hands a few months down the line!!! :bonk

    Why a few months??? Well, I need to figure it out myself!!!! :bonk :rotfl
     
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  3. Anitap

    Anitap IL Hall of Fame

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    Very correct about the next target..... Always thinking and planning and planning.... Something that he has to buy / achieve is always in his mind. Witsend

    Some men have this "provider" concept wired too hard into them.

    I have to constantly remind that he is having high Bp because of this and force him to switch his mind off...Not sure whether I am successful or not :-(
     
  4. Dinny

    Dinny IL Hall of Fame

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    You must tell me for how long have you been married?? If you are newly married then i am not surprised..BTW my husband's also like this.But theres a reason to it ...he cant pretend..he cant pretend to be very romantic..i am sure instead of buying me gifts he'll give me the money and say buy one for yourself...
    Earlier it used to hurt because i used to compare my life with others.But now i know him too well...he's a guy who ends up forgetting his own b'day( yaa u read it right his own b'day).So how can i expect him to remember my b'day..
    In your case study your husband( ok its not like he's a Guinea pig) i mean just see if his behavior is consistent.Does he behave like this to only you or to others around him too.I meant like does he shower his close friends and relatives with gifts.
    Sometimes we ladies do go over board and expect a gift every now and then....isnt that very materialistic??spare him ..
    Understand if he really loves you he'll shower you with love and not gifts....
    Have a happy married life :)
     
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  5. luckyme

    luckyme Silver IL'ite

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    Very nice thread and views

    We had a love marriage and I remember my husband buying me a bouquet on the valentines before we decided to marry...and after that I would really have go deep down the memory lane :)

    Gifting is just not him...though he's ready to pay me back after I buy something for myself...earlier I used to at least make him pay an now I have stopped that too
    I take care of gifting the whole family and he's just busy being care-free :)...but having loving husband is enuf

    Now a days I have also stopped gifting him though I still buy him a card and flowers on occasions.....he doesn't even do that :)

    Yesterday I heard him saying that I haven't gifted him anything in so many yrs and he wants a valentines day gift...I suddenly felt that I m the husband and not him ;)...but I guess our roles in terms of gifting have reversed...so. Have decided to gift him something ..though he never ever talked about gifting me nething...

    That's how it is for some of us...just be happy
     
  6. aminroop

    aminroop IL Hall of Fame

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    i wud say u stop buying him gifts too.

    but then an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. na?!
     
  7. bhuvnidhi

    bhuvnidhi IL Hall of Fame

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    Good idea...Even if it makes blind itz okay as money will be saved .Stop buying gifts for him and see if it pinches him.If not,well andgood.put the money in savings account.

    OP, I assume you are actually not bothered about the gift but need his attention.How is he when it comes to others like friends and FOO ?
     
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  8. SimpleGirl

    SimpleGirl Gold IL'ite

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    I like your idea Archana.... I guess I should try doing that too..
    My DH does remember all the days.... and also wants to gift me.. but the only problem is he will start thinking about it late evening on that day.... and then he will ask me.. what should I get you.. till then I am already frustrated about not getting any gift.. and have no mood to go shopping.. So we end up going to temple and having finner at some place..


     
  9. Rukumaniqa

    Rukumaniqa Senior IL'ite

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    Take his credit card and do some shopping, then he will submit next time. :)

    Jokes apart, take it easy Priya, symbolic getures are inferior to real love and affection. On otherhand, my hubby by a lot for me, but I gift nothing because of his unique taste! :-(

    Thanks
     
  10. nancystalin

    nancystalin Silver IL'ite

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    Hey count my dh tooo :( the same here. and dear same pinch for you too he he he i really love the "because this is me" part.
     

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