Remarriage-Things to be considered

Preferably instead of the Arranged Marriage Russian Roulette, try to go the route of getting to know someone well, before committing for marriage. You probably did one Arranged Marriage Roulette in your life already.

 

Hi Dream Girl, congrats on your professional life and pray you get the legal decision soon.
Please don't set a deadline that too a short one to find a 'good' companion. to get 'married' yes you can set a deadline but in arranged marriages it only by luck you can find a good companion in your partner.
Are there other factors that forces you to get married before 29 yrs?
You are independent and as long as your parents are by your side, you dont have to hurry into a commitment.
My american colleague said this statement in a conversation and it is so true 'how do you know if someone is a jerk unless you live with them'
We were discussing the concept of living together and some of the older american colleagues did not approve of that concept thats when she said this. unless you spend time with someone you would not know their true nature.
I am not suggesting living together but discussing different topics over a course of time and making few important decisions together will give an idea of what kind of person they are.

During searching alliance for my marriage, i was more keen on knowing how the groom's parents were talking to my parents. like if they are rude, egoistic because of their status or because they have a son, etc, coming to groom, whether he can distinguish what is fair and unfair. if he has been making his own decisions without blindly following parents words.
There was an alliance, he said 'i got a very good opportunity in my field of study but in a different city but my parents said dont go as you are our only son, stay with us and go for any available job' so he was working in a different field.
You have to watch for subtle clues but there are occassions you might mistake and miss a good alliance but that is the chance we have to take if we dont have too much time on our hands.

 

Basically I meant a love marriage instead of an arranged since you have more chance to interact and know a person.
Understand their attitudes and principles, and see how they mesh with your own.

 

Spidey this is a myth that in love marriage one can love someone/know to make a decision that one can live life with that person. my friend had dated a divorcee for 4 years, he went into marriage against his family wishes, got divorced and has a kid.

Love marriage or arrange marriage, there is no guarantee, as the dynamics of marraige changes on time, situation and so many other factors..

A friend of mine says he knows a friend who had dated 8 years to a girl, but could not live 3 months together....

 

Thats why I didnt just say Love or A.M.

I said "Understand their attitudes and principles, and see how they mesh with your own".

Because attitudes and principles are a bit more long lasting.

 

I believe its luck....very hard to judge others .....

 

So, what suggestion would you give to dream.girl for the question she is asking?

 

Shrikala you are right, those red flags are there somewhere.