Need suggestions abt my life...mentally n physically hurt...

Dear Shamah,

First of all, how are you now? Yes, it certainly was not a good move at all but again we are are humans. Tendencies to get over emotional happens.

Right now, what you have to do is mentally stabilize yourself. Then decide what you want to do next. Remember, you can only move forward if you are mentally stable!!

Re-organize yourself. Get a job and build your self-confidence.

Where is your child? How long have been in your parents place? When was your last contact with DH and family? Where did this incident happened? MIL's place?

They have become very comfortable disrespecting you. Nobody should degrade another human being. Move smart from now on. Get some legal advice. I am not telling you to go for a divorce! A legal advice here is to mainly safe guard yourself. You will get an idea of what you can do next.

Take care and be bold.

 

y divorce???? u have to stay there and give them their own piece of cake... y n how can we let them go jus like that by taking divorce???

sorry op.. but my decision is not divorce.. go to ur inlaws place(before going do the following things : 1. get a job...in matter of time any job..low salary or high..watever.. there are n number of jobs if u have no conditions on salary or expectations... job just to have urself sometime n mental peace n to show them that u r a big person... 2. arrange for a daycare/nanny/ask ur mom to take care of ur baby.. how old is ur baby? u can leave ur baby in ur moms place n collect baby wen coming back from work.. for all the expenses don use ur money/ur parents... go n ask straight to ur h itself for money.. if he says no.. then u say u will go to police.. ) after deciding all this go to ur inlaws house.. stay there as if u r the queen... do some cooking , u eat , feed baby, get ready for office, leave baby at ur mums place, go to work, eve collect baby from mums place, go back home, prepare something n eat n feed baby n watch some tv n sleep... if they ques u give them answer back nicely...
don bend .. stand up for urself n ur baby..

i personally don believe in divorce.. because it affects ladies more than men.. again u would b the sufferer.. he may remarry n b happy.. but for ladies its v difficult.. so u have to take up charge n b bold..

all the best!

 

i asked u t get job just for sometime to spend for urself n stay peaceful for sometime.. but moneywise ask him to spend every penny for u n ur baby.. coz u hav all rights.. ur his wife n ur baby belongs to him so he s bound to spend for u both.. he cant say no..

save the money that u earn for future..ur future.. don give this to him..

 

Sorry to hear that...

Do you want to continue whole life like this? Do you think that your child is growing up in a healthy environment?


Before moving out, please collect all evidence against physical and mental abuse.
If you have a mobile phone, please record them from now onward. Collect all evidences for the transactions you made with your DH family. ( Gold, Money etc )

Look for a job and try to be independent. As soon as you become independent, rent
a house and move out. Stay away from MIL. Check if your DH's attitude towards you improves after that or not. If no improvement, find a lawyer and seek legal
help. Submit all evidence you have collected and demand for compensation / alimony.

Your Parents may not be in a position to accept all these things. You do not bother
them with your financial needs. If you are financially independent, they would definitely support you.

May God Bless you..

 

OP, I feel sad for ur situation. Hw are you nw? Why you didn’t think about ur kid before doing such thing? The only sufferer wil be your son. Pls do not even think about it anytime.
Do you really want to continue this marriage?. If ur son grows up in such atmosphere, he will also be abused along with you or will turn to be an abuser. Both are not going to be good for u two. You have gone to the extent of killing yourself, you find a job and live separately with your parents. Now ur dh and inlaws will take this incident a reason to pointout against you. If you really wish to give another chance to your husband, u call and ask your husband what is his decision. Decide what needs be done after your husband’s response, don’t waste your time expecting him to call.

 

Leaving a MNC job juz because someone forced - Blunder
Having a child even after realizing issues in the short span - Another Blunder
Attempting suicide -Uttermost blunder

OP, u need to do some serious thinking, if you are waiting for someone to save you and handover ur life, not going to happen. u have child depending on you.. High time u take a stand and do self supporting. If you don't want to give this moron divorce then don't. Get a job, secure your life then think abt next when u r ready.

 

Dear Shamah, how are you now and how is the situation at home?

Don't ever try to take a step to end your life, you should think about your baby. Who will look after the baby, that monster father? When you become a mother your responsibility increases, whatever you think and do in your life it reflects your kid's life. So please take care of yourself. As you said you were working before the marriage. So try to resume your work, concentrate on your career and kid. Once you are settled mentally and professionally, then you can think about what to do with that monster husband. Till then my suggestion is, better to stay with your parents.

 

I sympathize with you and ladies have already given you suggestions. I agree with shruthisp . "We do not do things just because someone forces us to do. We always have our own reasons for doing it". Pray to GOD to give you strength to take the right step in your life so that you and your child can have a good life. The sentence"worse than illiterate" in your post has bothered me. All illiterates are not worse FYI.