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divorce advice needed

Discussion in 'Life Without Spouse' started by poornimavl6, Aug 11, 2015.

  1. poornimavl6

    poornimavl6 New IL'ite

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    hi friends

    i got married in 2005 and have two children of 9 and 3 respectively but right from the second day of marriage i am not happy my husband he keeps suspecting me for every step n keeps commenting me negetively for everythng i am not allowed to go for a job also and my inlawas and my husband never respects even my parents and my brothers they treat them very badly due to all this my parents are totally disturbed i hav given them many chances for them to change but still now nothing s positive so after all this i am planning to get away from my husband taking my kids i am planning for a divorce so pls do advice me regarding this i have totally gone to a depression state were i have attempted suicide several times and due to ths depression i have completly lost my health so please do advice were i can plan my divorce peacefully
     
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  2. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    OP,you had two children in a bad marriage.You tried to kill yourself when you have small children to care for.
    You plan to divorce without having any financial stability.

    You seem to be really depressed and hence incapable of taking sound decisions in life.

    1)Please get help for your depression. You and our children deserve a better life. Please seek help.

    2) Once your depression is taken care of , think about getting a job. Try to gain some financial stability.

    3) Then re -assess your life. See if you want to stay in this marriage or want to get out of it.
    Also assess if the children will be better off with you or your husband and his family. If they are good to your children and caring ,then you could leave them with husband and choose to have visitation rights.

    For now,get some help for your depression.Please don't ever think about ending your life.Your children deserve a stronger mother.

    Hugs to you .
     
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  3. poornimavl6

    poornimavl6 New IL'ite

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    thanks for ur kind suggestions who ever it s i had litrally no person to share my feelings tdy i am vry much satisfied tat someone s understanding me because whenever i try to explain my problem to any of them they used to either make fun of me that i hav two children with bad marriage or some wud tell these issues are quite normal but for me it s as though i am in a deadend because even birth of my kids are not my choice but i luv my kids because watever my problem is my kids are innocent thanks a lot
     
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  4. catwalk

    catwalk Gold IL'ite

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    Sorry to hear your story. You are not alone. You can see many families in this forum
    sharing their experiences. If it helps, you can discuss your problems here with complete anonymity and get help. Committing Suicide is not a solution for any problems.

    You have two beautiful children to support you. Focus on their life and move forward. Before moving for divorce, get financial independence. If you are educated, you can apply for a job or fine tune your skills. Or be an entrepreneur. There are many micro finance schemes available. Government agencies would give you training and capital.

    if it helps to get peace of mind, live separately for sometime. It may give an opportunity for both to decide if divorce is inevitable or not. Practice Yoga.

    Discuss the issues with your parents and siblings. Take them into confidence.
    At the end , if you decide to proceed with the divorce, then find a lawyer from your
    relative / friends circle. He will file the case at family court and they will issue the order after consulting with both parties.
     

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