Friends...Pls help me....

Harinigireesh · Jul 21, 2014

Dear Friends,

I am Harini from Chennai. I am new for IL. I am expecting Your valuable suggestions. If you reply as soon its more help for me. ya... now i explain my prob. I am newly married. my husband got a job in UAE. he will go to abroad this month end. he can't take with me to go to abroad. after 1 yr only he will come back to India. my problem is my husband native is Kerala. I am from Tamilnadu. also, i am new to that state. culture, language is my problem. also, am not believe my in laws. my mother stay with my sister house. my father is no more. my mother and myself not having a good relationship now.I have a small 2 months boy baby. I can't stay in any P.G. which place is better to stay ? my husband suggest to me to stay with his parents. or he says, it's my wish. any place Chennai or Kerala both he is O.K. i can't take a good decision. I am bit confused. i am waiting for your reply friends.

-Harini

indoc · Jul 21, 2014

Better ask your mom to stay with you.. preferably rent a place close to your sisters..

Harinigireesh · Jul 21, 2014

Hi mam,

Sorry to say... My mom can't to stay with me. My sister is working. my sister's kid having 3yrs old. no body take care of her. also my mom fight with me. i am unable to stay with their.
Thank u.

yellowmango · Jul 21, 2014

Why do you not believe in laws.Has something happened? If mom is not an option ...then the only option left is in laws unless you want to stay alone somewhere.

Harinigireesh · Jul 21, 2014

Thank u mam. I will consider to stay with my in laws. It's better to compare to stay alone.

-Harini

gauridinesh · Jul 22, 2014

Are you working? If yes, hire a maid (full time) and you both stay in chennai.
In-laws is the next option - considering that it will be a problem staying with such a young kid alone.

SGBV · Jul 22, 2014

Try to stay with in laws. Learn their language and try to better understand the life style of your H.

If your mom is not supportive, then it is best to get support from in laws after marriage. Why do you think they are not believable? Any issues in the past to believe so?

If so, then find a house near your sister's home where your mom also lives. Hope you are not working, so you can manage your chores and kid alone. Having a blood relative around/near is always helpful at the time of emergency. It will also help to pass time, and have some emotional support since you may miss your H now.

Or do the same near your in laws...

mariselviprabu · Jul 22, 2014

From my experience , it's better to stay wit in - laws. That way your husband ll be committed too. You can stay with your mum on and off.

sumanrathi · Jul 22, 2014

Be with your mom and stay near to your sister home this will be comfortable for you.

Ask your hubby and take you and your kids to UAE as early as possible.

good luck with God wishes.

Harinigireesh · Jul 23, 2014

Hi mam,

Thank u for Ur suggestions first. Ya.. i will plan to stay with my in-laws. between my in laws- and myself miss understanding is their. apart that, i am not having any issue with them. they are always understood in wrong about me. cause of communication problem. they not listen what i says. they refuse and also they compel me to do they are culture activities. My husband are act and support for his parents.(Over respect) my husband is only son of his parents. sometimes, my MIL create drams and sympathy so my hub can't react on that situation. also, he is try to convenience me always. so I give up. I am scarred to stay with them. now I don't know what to do. my hub says,after 1 year he will take me to abroad. my sister also suggest me to stay with my in-laws.

-Harini