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Divorced and dating a younger guy

Discussion in 'Life Without Spouse' started by Jazmine83, Jun 18, 2014.

  1. Jazmine83

    Jazmine83 Gold IL'ite

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    Thanks SGBV!

    I am watching out for all the red flags in the relationship.
     
  2. MrsBV

    MrsBV Gold IL'ite

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    girl do what your heart and head says! The guy has stood by you, if he was not serious about you, believe me he wouldnt have stood up for you against his parents. Take your time, gauge him and if he makes you happy, forget everyone and be with him. All the best and hugs!
     
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  3. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    Don't worry.. If you guys are living in the US, it solves half of your problems. Go ahead :)
     
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  4. sdiva20

    sdiva20 Platinum IL'ite

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    Op- I am happy for you that you found love again.

    Age truly is a number and it is written no where that that man has to be older. I am seeing more and more couple where the woman is older by 2,3 or even older. If the maturity level and compatibility is there, that is all that is needed.

    Always in case of marriage and love one has to exercise a certain degree
    of caution. After all its one of the most important decisions of life.

    Don't worry about age or even his parents. Even when parents find the partner, if they want to cause trouble, they can. Most important thing is to make sure this guy will stand with you through thick and thin.



    Wish you good luck and hope you find your happiness.
     
  5. Ragini25

    Ragini25 Platinum IL'ite

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    can u pls provide ur phone num :goodidea:
     
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  6. onlineguide

    onlineguide New IL'ite

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    The case study for OP

    I read your post 3 times with attention, The description in you post what brought me in doubt is " He has seen me go through a tough time in previous marriage" .

    The possibilities which I see here is may be he might be just in concern with your feelings which can be a miss interpreted concept of love. And I can sense the feeling just because its all written when you thought to describe the relationship.

    I suggest you to try your ease in relationship by understanding each other related to your feelings, Your need and wants of future and practicing your nature.

    The concept of age will come into consideration only when there will be a discussion on any vital matters which will make your head to be Superior by judging the right way to lead on the right track.

    The concept and thinking of your parents which makes u more possessive is the last point in view, You will have to face problems only if you look at them. I can say if your partner is not bringing up your past, Still there will be people around who will be filling up the position to hurt you as this is their work and in few of the times if your partner would marry you against your in-laws they will be rude in some place. But you will have to make them happy and understand the situation.

    This is what i have seen in few of the relationships, Only thing you have to do is be patient.

    I am not trying to be negative, I only wrote what i felt was right and what my experience says.

    If you felt bad I say sorry ...
     
  7. Jazmine83

    Jazmine83 Gold IL'ite

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    Hey guys,

    About time for me to post an update. Lot has happened. BF made a trip to India and spoke to his parents in person. Though there were initial negative reactions, his parents are now at a point where they are ok. I met kinda the god father of his family in my recent trip to india. I have gotten quite close to his cousins and few key members in the family. BF mom is saying some nice things about me...like she is a nice simple girl, But has not spoken to me yet. We have some spies in his house :p...they are confirming us that there is a positive change and everything will be ok.

    And personally I have grown as well. I have come out of my fear and I am just focusing on the positives. Another important change in me is finding happiness within myself. Though I am happy in my relationship with my BF...I am realizing even without him, I will still lead a positive happy life...that realization took care of the dependecy issues and just made a me a happy person in general :)
     
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  8. Iamagoodgirl

    Iamagoodgirl Platinum IL'ite

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    This attitude is dangerous.
    Do you think this guy will able to protect you from his parents?Stand for you against his whole foo at the cost of loosing their support lifelong?

    If i was you i would make sure that he is much powerful in his circle or he has guts to let go his support network for you if they refuse to accept you.

    If he isnt that much powerful you let this go otherwise you will end up in marriage where his side of people abuse isolate you and husbands turn deaf to the situation.
     
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  9. ivlakshmi

    ivlakshmi Platinum IL'ite

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  10. Jazmine83

    Jazmine83 Gold IL'ite

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    Hi goodgirl,

    I agree. That is not a good attitude. I wrote that when I was really emotional when I knew the ride was not going to be an easy one.
    But now that i am riding it, it is not that bad. I have learnt to take things lightly and just enjoy the ride.
    My bf is being a great support to me.And also, I am not going to compromise my self respect for anything.... Other than his mom, everyone else seem to like me...especially the cousins and younger generation. Another surprise was his grandma really took a liking to me after meeting me...

    I am going to hope love and patience will have its own rewards...lets' see :)
     
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