What should I do

Hi SL,JL ,NL,

I am very new to this community and wanted to share some things with u all.I was seperated from my dh last year and he had applied for divorce in europe and which will be come in 2 months and I had filed a case in India.(I had a very big story I will explain u later).

Here I had 2 issues

1)At present I am living in europe to continue my studies whicha re half way through,I think at this time I should more concentrate on studies but it has become really tough to concentrate.But my parents are willing to complete my degree so that it would be good for me.I had also come in the same thought.The degree is tough and the teaching is bad and there was no one to help me and now I am all alone here.

when my parents call me I say iam fine and doing good with studies,once when I said that I dont want to study they were tensed that I would come back to India by leaving the studies.

2)Accidentally 2 days back I met a guy in chat, i was like searching for a movie at one place he said "hi" it continued,it was like we fought and he apologised then we started talking that I am married ,during this chat period he was very true telling abt him and a he is going to start a new cmpny abt real estate and giving Loans to NRIs ,said abt his webpage and asked me to see ,but I was lying for about 3 hrs as I was scared that people lie in chat and atlast when I asked for some help in LOAN he gave his no. and his frnds tooin ICICI bank,so I thought that it is not good to lie any more so I told abt me.and we were chatting on weekend also.I clearly mentioned him that i will not meet him or talk to him and he should not expect anyhting on one fine day.I said we r just chatting frnds similiar to pen frnds ,he said he doesnt care its ok for him.The guy is from India only and from our local place.

so frnds please suggest me in this 2 issues what should I do with my studies and should I continue chatting with this guy or stop him ,is it good for me at this situation.

waiting for your valuable suggestions.

Thanks in advance!
dream girl.

Hello dream girl,
I am very sorry to hear about your divorce and can understand the mental trauma you may be facing now. But i guess there might be a real strong reason that lead you to take such a big decision. And coming to your first issue, i strongly advise you to continue your studies and move on with your life. I know ... its really hard to concentrate on studies at this particular juncture ... but still you have to make through it and get a degree. Why dont you seek help from your co-students or friends? If there are none who could help you there, join some online community related to your academics and try to get help. I understand its real hard , but only if you are brave, you can keep going.Regarding the second case, i feel you should stick to your point that you will never meet him or talk to him... atleast ... no i dont like to mention the time period also. He might have shared his number and other details, but that doesn't mean he is not lying or that he is a good man. There is nothing wrong in continueing chatting but make sure you dont give your details anymore, lest he may turn out to be a nasty guy and may take advantage of your situation.
Listen to what other mature ILs like to say about it and carry on. Never feel alone. Try to make friends in your place, who could be trust worthy and who can support you. All the best.

Hi Dreamgirl

I am sorry to hear about your divorce, but at the same time happy that your are out of a bad relationship. Relationship not working doesn't imply both the persons in relationship being bad. So, if you can forgive that person(i know its tough, but it will save you from hurt) and concentrate on your studies. Financial independence gives one a confidence and motivation to take on tough times

Regarding the guy, Iam bit wary of chatting to total strangers. May be you are feeling lonely, why don't you join some club, go to disco etc or join some sports, you wil make few good friends and get to know them also and who knows someone may just click

Best wishes
Ansh

Hi Dream Girl,

Wake up from your dreams!!! Time to kick yourself and keep going with your life.
With all those bad things coming to an end in the relationship, it is time to put your life on track and get something done for yourself.

So get going with your studies; study hard; get yourself a degree and plan your career or life ahead. First set a foundation for yourself.

With regards to your new found friend on the net - my view is - Lady be careful! Don't want to sound negative. Best is to concentrate on your studies. Move around with your known circle if you are feeling lonely or left out. Keep yourself occupied with other activities. Your life is more precious and important than chatting with this guy!

All the best lady!

Cheers
Jenz

Thanq very much for lending u r precious time to read my posts and also for giving reply with in no time.

U all boosted me up ,trying to continue with the studies.I will do my best.
The other thing abt the guy u sound me to be careful,and lend my time with the people around me ,ya thats true I also feel its fantasy to talk to a person whom u dont know the face.I will try to reduce or mostly stop talking wit him.

Once again my heartfull thanks to u all.

Regards,
dreamgirl.

I am little confused by your questions. So what are your doubts..

- That should you complete education or not? - I think you pretty much know the importance of education. No one needs to spoon feed anyone on this.

- About the guy in chat, I would suggest a stern refrainment. when in distress never open too many threads in life. First have a neat closure to what you have at hand. Give yourself sometime to heal from everything. Only then open up for any new venturing.

Internet is full of all kinds of people. Your venue of search will decide the quality of search also. So anything random on internet is most likely to be as random as driving a car with both eyes closed.

Hope this helps.

Ria

@ria

Thanks a lot for your straight answers,education is really imp. for me at this stage,but due to the bad incident in my life it is taking really some time to concentrate.

@Indrabolt

I am sorry there was nothing about any dealings between the guy and me, he said that he is gonna start a company relaated to RE and giving loans to nris etc.

Any ways I am stopping chatting with him.

Thanks for your valuable suggestions!

Regards,
Dreamgirl.