What Should I Do?

Hi Everybody,
I am facing a strange problem in my house. I have an elder sister who is quite marriageable. She does not want to marry right now and on the other hand my boy friend will be leaving for US in a year and so their parents want us to get married. But my parents are of the opinion that the eldest of the house should marry first, so I will have to wait till my sister gets married. I have tried in vain to make my parents understand. And right now I am unable to come to a decision. What should I do? Please girls help me…I really need your help at this time…
I hope you will…
Waiting eagerly for your replies…
Take care,
Bye,
Mousumi

Dear Mousmi
you have to make your parents understand that the times have changed...
what if tommorrow this guy goes away and finds someone else..how long can he and his family wait...why should his family suffer when all is fine with them...why to create a problem for one daughter if another one is not ready to marry..... you should ask your sister to intervene as this problem to some extent is due to her( though personally I feel this is injustice to her , but then to make your parents understand, these are just tools.)If I think of anything else I'll write again.

Dear Mousmi,
i agree with Muzna. Things have changed, give the pros and cons to your parents and if you can talk to anyone within the famil whom your parents are close to so that he or she can make them understand and ask your sis bluntly whether she wants to get married or not and she should intervene and talk to your parents.
talk to elders of your family who would understnad your situation.
love
alpa

hi mousumi
i think you should talk to your sister first and try to find out if she is also having some problem with getting you married first... if she don't have any problem then she will definitly help you and make your parents understand... after all she is your sis and wants best for you so try to make her understand the pros and cons of this situation. i'm sure she will understand your situation.

Simple! Talk it over with your parents. If they dont see reason, then simply get married under the Special Marriage Act. You should take the help of a lawyer. Once you are married, your parents are bound to see reason.
Love is blind. You need to make inquiries about the groom and his family whom you are so desparate to marry.

Hey Muzna, Alpa, sweet jindagi and BandanaSen,
Thanks for all your suggestions. I really think I should talk over to my sis and my parents. And, one thing came to my mind after getting your suggestions is that why my sis is not ready to get married? I must ask her frankly. My family does not have any problem with my boyfriend nor does my boyfriend's family have any probs. Just the thing is that I am the younger kid.
Bye, lots of love...
Mousumi

Hello Mousumi,
I think it will be better to ask your sister to talk to your parents. If she really does not want to get married then she should tell your parents about it and also make it clear that it is no harm in getting the younger marry first. There are plenty of cases where the elder of the house has married long after the younger got married. However, I do not think that you should ask your sister blatantly whether she wants to get married or not, she may have some reasons and it might hurt her sentiments as well since you don’t know why she does not want to get married.
I understand your anxiety and worry but this is a very delicate matter and you should handle it carefully.
Do ask your sister to talk to your parents.
Do update about what happened…
Take care,
Teesta

Dear mousumi ,
I do feel your problem being younger and need to get married early.this is more with bengali families but I guess u make an attempt to get maaried together with in a shrt time frame and let your boyfriend wait for a while .It is not of distrust but he will too feel for both of u .I wish I could gift both of you sisters a wedding gift on the same date ...hope u come back to all of us after starting a new life .
best of wish for both of you .
ashish

Hello Muza, Alpa, Sweet Zindegi and Teesta,

Thanks a lot for your help. I never imagined that my post will receive so many replies. I am glad to have friends like you. Yes, I think I should better talk to my sister about it. Since it also concerns her, and yes she is the kind of sister on whom I can rely on. I will ask her to talk to our parents.

But the thing is my parents are somewhat determined on they have said, and to be true they are bit from the old school. But they will have to understand my situation as well.

Thanks again,
Love and take care,
Mousumi