bengali wedding rituals

while hunting for information asked abt verusha, abt the bangles, thought why not post the entire wedding rituals of bengali's for all here who are interested..regards sunkan

Hi Sunkan,
i went through ur doc and reminded me of my marriage we too have almost same rituals in North with a little difference. we dont have shankh bangles and covering face with paan, in UP marriages glass bangles are must for marriage and we have some tradition before real marriage start that is to be done by the bride's maternal uncle only. so for any marriage a mother remembers her brother very badly and prays wherever he is he must come on time. if i remember things correctly then i will post about UP marriage. i dont remember so many things of my marriage, as i was too much tired and feeling God if anyone let me sleep somewhere in peace. Actually this was first wedding in our family and i am the eldest so i had so many responsibilties to take care, my parents were totally confused and panic. now waiting for sis and brothers marriage.

bye
padma

Thanks..

I did not have the paan as my head & face was completely covered with duppata...

But it was qutie funny when they covered us both & the pujari said that we must lovingly glance at each other!!!

Another funny part was when we had to exchange garlands... my hubby forgot that he is so much taller & had this pointy thing on his head, that I could not actually reach to put the garland over his head!!!

Padma - I can relate to those aspects as well.. Since my grand parents are from UP.. my older sister's wedding (which was in south africa) had those traditions..

However I chose to get married in west bengal and so followed bengali traditions & customs...

hey everybody

i have seen in the movies that in bengali weddings... all the ladies make this strange sounds, and something with their tongue... i've always wondered what is its significnce and why make suchc sounds... can somebody explain the tradition ???

hey padma

I also got married in UP, but instead of gass bangles we wear Ivory bangles (red white also called "chooda"). which part of UP are u from ?

~Abha

Originally Posted by Abha

hey everybody

i have seen in the movies that in bengali weddings... all the ladies make this strange sounds, and something with their tongue... i've always wondered what is its significnce and why make suchc sounds... can somebody explain the tradition ???

hey padma

I also got married in UP, but instead of gass bangles we wear Ivory bangles (red white also called "chooda"). which part of UP are u from ?

~Abha

dear abha,
this is just to put off any evil talks, ashub statements, while the marriage go on. u will see a getti melam in south india, it is just to make it auspicious not to hear any one talk bad things stop bad oman and so on...regards sunkan

Hey Sunkan

thats a very nice tradition i must say, nothing of that sort happens in our north indian weddings...

thanks
~Abha

Hi Abha,

i am from eastern UP but i had spent only three years of my mlife there mostly i spent in Karnataka. i am originally from Gorakhpur near Lucknow, i think u r from Ghaziabad or Noida. i have chuda as i like it very much now also i wear chuda. in our marriage we have to wear glass bangles red or green or yellow or orange or pink same bangles we have to wear for one month and a week after that we can take out and wear less bangles of our own choice. i don't like all traditions of eastern UP but we have to follow. but i like one thing very much after marriage daily some married women like MIL or anyone elder in family fill that sindoor to newly wed bride for forty five days after puja in morning and give her sweet to eat. u know i like this very much as i like sweet in morning and i dont have to wait for breakfast haha ha .... actually i am a big foody and i used to feel shy to say i want to have breakfast at 8am everyone will have at 9 or 9.30 by that time there will be big mice race in my tummy.
Abha we have in our marriage to put off the bad things away during haldi priest will give iron ring to wear to the bride i got that last year i took it out. in some part of UP last night after mehandi bride will wear saree glass bangles bindi whatever all suhag things except sindoor and then after 12 at night she will break all suhag things and cry with mom and sis, then all elder women will bless her for a long married life and then they sing, but we did not have this in our marriage i saw in my neighbour's daughter's marriage. kisi ki nazar na lage.


see u in next post

bye
padma

hey padma

I'm actually from Delhi (lived all my life there before marriage) but my hubby is from lucknow, but in both our families we had this tradition of wearing chooda...

and for protecting fom eveil eye, we do wear lohe ka kada, with wich sisters (married unmarried both) tie all the "Kaleere"... it looks very beautiful... but has to worn only on the wedding day... well its been 6 months that i got married, but i'm still wearing Chooda... but i've reduced it to half now... lets see will forward it further around one year of marriage...

take care
~Abha

HI Abha,

nice to see ur response i was in in Delhi for 4years after graduation i went there 2times to my mamaji's place. i have friend from Delhi he married to my friend she is from Kanpur, i saw she took out her choodas after 1year 3months at her husbands house, these two were classmates lovebirds since 10 std. i like keelare i have seen, at my native place there are many punjabi's. for my sister's marriage i have planned combination of gujratis, punjabi and bengali tradition. only once in life. jeeyo jee bhar ke.

bye
padma

Dear Sunkan
Thanks for the info.
A relative is married to a bengali and when I attended the wedding, couldnt understand much of what was happening though someone from their side tried to explain. Got a better picture now !
rgds
manjula