menopause......mental and physical condition

hai folks,
when is someone going to start talking abt this....i am sure all of us have gone through...going through and will go through ...i mean all age group...i would like to mention here during my time i was a very cranky personality with none to approach and my family suffered a lot ...i never knew what i was inflicting on to them...being very sarcastic and irritated by all issues..small and big....untill they removed my uterus....doctors felt this the simple way to end my bleeding years of 10plus ...which was very very long .....but felt very energetic.....then i was fine and moved abt a lot.....only the loss was grt ....felt something belonging to me personal telling the world i ama female taken away from me all because it has lost its duty....and diabetic set in....mental condition of a woman is very important ....my view is she should not opt to work untill the situation really calls for...we throw up a lot of pleasure ..from the simple toothless laughter and giggles to pure motion of evolution in our babies...some one else has the go without the strain of bringing them into this world...and the children who grow under mother who is at home r so different they r not selfish and generous in their attitude .....untill u pamper the daylights for them they do turn into grt citizens...now back to menopause....used to have severe pain in the abdomen and for no reason my throat used to dry up...even now i have this have to have water beside dont know when the crisis might come....i have comeout of this with grt turbulance ....will some one tell how they managed ...and some who want to seek can take help from them...hope this is a sparkling and enlightening thread for all..regards...sunkan

MENOPAUSE……… A NEW BEGINNING

Enter 40s and you have stepped into one of the most eventful phases of your life. With the arrival of 40s women have to prepare themselves for menopause. With your mind, body and soul geared in the right direction, the fourties can usher in an absolute revolution in your lives, taking your success to new heights, making sex more enjoyable, and chiseling a beautiful new women out of you. Thus with the arrival of 40s your life takes a new turn and it is a new and exciting beginning.

However for many women 40s mean end of sex life. They are worried about turning into one of those old and haggard persons with loose skin, sagging breasts and pockets of flab accumulated at wrong places and those who are miles apart from love and romance. Women are bogged down by the fear that menopause would mercilessly kill their blissful life. Thus women see menopause as a serious threat to their love life and wallow in self-pity and remain withdrawn. A significant number of women link the physical changes of old age with menopause. Menopause is accepted with great difficulty by most of the women and everyone reacts differently to it. Some women view it as normal and experience very little difference in their moods or bodies while others think that it is abnormal and feel terribly upset and disturbed.

1. Menopause……know the truth. Menopause is the turning point in a women's life. It doesn't arrive suddenly. It takes around 3-4 years beginning with peri menopause or climacteric period when the body starts running out of eggs, ovulation becomes sporadic, hormone levels fluctuate and the cycle becomes unpredictable. Gradually this drop in hormones occurs frequently and becomes permanent, leading to a complete full stop to the menstruation cycle. Apart from bringing a halt in the menstrual cycle, menopause leads to other hormonal changes in the body like baldness, vaginal dryness, sagging and shrinking of breasts etc. However experts are of the opinion that menopause is an individualized experience and not all women necessarily experience the same symptoms. With menopause there is lack of necessary and essential hormones - estrogen and progesterone - in the body as a result of which there occurs a decrease in the flow of blood in the vagina, due to which its walls become thinner and lose their elasticity.

These factors cause terrible discomfort while having sex. There may be irritation and infection too causing serious aversion to sex. However experts believe that this may not always be so. Sometimes even if you don't experience the discomfort you may just not be interested in intercourse any more. Thus menopause, all over the world, is believed to be a cause in the decrease in sexual activity. Women experience a marked decline in her sexual interest leading to a decrease in her sex drive. However according to experts although there is a drop in the level of estrogen, the testosterone convert itself into estrogen and the women still continues to have the same vigour and vitality for sex. Thus menopause in not the end of sex life.

2. Change your outlook. Menopause brings a radical change in the relationship of man and woman. Most of the women totally lack interest in sexual activities and become withdrawn. Women gradually start harbouring a feeling in their mind that with menopause she has stepped into old age and that she is no longer attractive and interesting to her man. The man might have some misconceptions too. He tends to link the lack of interest on his wife's part to menopause. However the truth is that menopause is the stage when no ovulation takes place in the woman's body and this is related to her reproductive cycle and not her sex drive. Thus it is all in the mind. Being attractive or not is also not at all related to her sex drive. Thus it is the misconception in the minds of people that menopause is the end of sex life and it has to be cleared.

3.Learn to enjoy menopause. Sex need not suffer with the onset to menopause. In fact it could be turned into a fruitful and passionate experience if both partners make efforts for the same. Post menopause could in fact be the golden years of sex. Sex after menopause can be as fulfilling, satisfying, exciting, adventurous and pleasurable as your first sex. It can be as beautiful as it was in the early years. Couples can in fact have better sex life after menopause since there is an end to menstrual cycle, which means there is no need to take birth control pills, and thus an added amount of time and attention can be diverted to this beautiful act.

An important aspect of sex during menopause if foreplay. Couples are ignorant of the role of foreplay in sex, especially during menopause since the woman experiences pain during sex due to inelastic vaginal walls. This pain can however be alleviated by keeping your sex activity regular and spending more time during foreplay. Thus spending more time in foreplay is important to arouse the women's desire, which further helps in lubricating the vaginal walls. The couples can also try out various positions that cause less pain and more pleasure.

4. Exercise for better results. To enjoy sex women should exercise to improve the flow of blood to the vagina so that you experience less vaginal discomfort. Don't ever give up on sex. Rediscover each other's body and experiment with new techniques. Increase your time in foreplay. There are exercises in Yoga, which help in contracting the P.C. muscles, which lead to more pleasurable and satisfying sex and reduce the problems of vaginal discomfort. Besides this lubricating creams are also available in the market that help decrease the vaginal dryness and enhance the act. Diet also plays an important role in menopause. There are foods that provide maximum hormones in the body and replace the deficient ones. Green vegetables, milk, soya bean are all rich in hormones. Regular exercise keeps your bones healthy and improves your body image and provides a renewed vigour.

Thus it solely depends upon the woman herself to consider menopause as an eventful phase of life and develop a positive outlook towards it, turning the occasion into a wonderful opportunity. Menopause does not signal the end of female sexuality, but it is the beginning of a woman's individual life. It is the whole new way of life. A fulfilling sexual relationship depends on how well you cope with it. A good sex life and a happy emotional partnership tend to enhance the bond between the partners and it is only you who could make it happen. You are worthy of a happy life and a great sex life only if you want one. So what are you waiting for….make this night your memorable night and all night from now on.

HI Sunkun,

I wish i will get some help from you regarding my problem .

Here it goes iam 31yrs with one daughter aged 2.2 motnths .Actually from the day my menses started (that is when i was 13 yrs) my peroids are little bit irregular .later on when i was 28 yrs i suddenly put on wt due to some personal problems and work stress and at that time my periods didnot come for 3 months .I went to doctors and had all checkups done including hormonal everything was alright.Then she gave some medicine to get periods .later on i got conceived and after my baby came my preiods started coming regularly .Now suddenly from past 1 yr same old problem my periods come once in 2months .I have done checkups and everything is normal except for pap smear test which is negetive.doctor told me usually it goes on its own and asked me to come for checkup after 6 months.

But then iam worried 'coz i want one more child maybe after 1 yr .Is anytthing abnormal with me .Is it some kind of symptom of premenapause.Iam having so many qeustions about this in my mind .I will be greatfull if somebody can help me to get rid of this tension.

These days iam having very serious mood changes and getting stressed out ,emotionally feeling low and tired,


I hope you will soothe my feelings by giving some suggestions ...




Thanks in advance.
waiting for your valuable response.......

Originally Posted by Mitra

HI Sunkun,

I wish i will get some help from you regarding my problem .

Here it goes iam 31yrs with one daughter aged 2.2 motnths .Actually from the day my menses started (that is when i was 13 yrs) my peroids are little bit irregular .later on when i was 28 yrs i suddenly put on wt due to some personal problems and work stress and at that time my periods didnot come for 3 months .I went to doctors and had all checkups done including hormonal everything was alright.Then she gave some medicine to get periods .later on i got conceived and after my baby came my preiods started coming regularly .Now suddenly from past 1 yr same old problem my periods come once in 2months .I have done checkups and everything is normal except for pap smear test which is negetive.doctor told me usually it goes on its own and asked me to come for checkup after 6 months.

But then iam worried 'coz i want one more child maybe after 1 yr .Is anytthing abnormal with me .Is it some kind of symptom of premenapause.Iam having so many qeustions about this in my mind .I will be greatfull if somebody can help me to get rid of this tension.

These days iam having very serious mood changes and getting stressed out ,emotionally feeling low and tired,


I hope you will soothe my feelings by giving some suggestions ...




Thanks in advance.
waiting for your valuable response.......

dear mitra,
all these periods irregularity is due to pollution, the latest study show the more u live among high polluted area, like the congested flats with not much room for the air to circulate and not enough sunlight, so if u can get away and take a small home in suburbs u can try, i am also going along with my elder daughter to a suburb kind of area, with more trees, and a spacious house as my present one is getting crowded with so many flats coming up around..so dont thinkit is something with ur health, but do try out some pranayama, or yoga it should help, and pl in the age group that u mention all ladies go through many mood swings,even a proper session which i call the sexual activity is not there, then also woman get more irritated, headache[one sided] and so on, so when u go against nature trying to put off as there is not time, the body cannot understand, try to normalise and dont worry abt the child u will defenitely have. now just be the happy mother, even while breast feeding ur periods may be erratic for me upto one year i had no periods after my first daughter was born, it is normal as the child breastfeeds, and good for u too. hope been of help, take some herbal juices, as sathya my sis in these forum she is a nature curist and might suggest some diet also....hope been of help regards sunkan

Hello,

It has been a great releif after reading your reply.Thanks a lot from my heart.I was really really stressed up with this matter .

I also want an help from you.I get stressed out very easily and tensed with very small issues also.Actaually iam emotional little bit week kind .I always feel like i need some support from somebody .


If you can help me hpw to come from stress and other things i will be great.

can u send me your private mail id ..so that i can mail you always and be a friend of your .


Thanks
Mitra

hi sukan

i just saw this thread which i found very useful. it's been over one year my uterus was removed and i also have back pain, hot flashes....

any tips abt it?

thanks

time heals it,
it does take sometime, but initially u need to rest a lot to comeout without pain in the lower back, that is not lift even a bucket of water for 6 months and for hot flushes just go and have a cold shower, irrelevant of time it soothes, i sometime used to bathe in the middle of the night in cold shower, and this being the fuse in our body u will not know when others are shivering with cold u will need a fan, even now it is the same problem...relax. dont take too much of coffee, try to divert ur mind to meditations and other things, dont get worked up whether u will have any sexual feelings and all, this may lead to more tensions, and ur body will start flushing hot and ur spine going hot, relax more, have more bath, if u have a tub lie down in it with cold water, u need to cool the spine more for sometime, after that u r great...sunkan

hi
thanks sunkan

Dear Sunkan,

Hello!!! After reading your blogs I feel that you are very informative person.

God bless you for sharing it with others like me.

By the way what exactly are hot flushes????

Please do let me know.

Thake care bye

Originally Posted by Edwina

Dear Sunkan,

Hello!!! After reading your blogs I feel that you are very informative person.

God bless you for sharing it with others like me.

By the way what exactly are hot flushes????

Please do let me know.

Thake care bye

dear edwina,
hot flushes is something that u experience on ur spine, your entire body will become hot and it goes up to your neck, u tend to sweat when others are shivering and shiver when others sweat it is the thermostat of the body gone hay wire, so u need to cut down on coffee, hot food, spicy masala, and anything like even family issues may trigger it off, and the feeling you r loosing your feminity, so u need to relax a lot and spend time on yoga or meditation, and when u feel hot don't hesitate to have a good cold shower, it helps a lot especially the spine portion if you have a tub or stand under shower with ur spine direct, sunkan