After 35 years and turning from age 25 to 60 is India still your home country?

Originally posted by Kamla

Hi Shoba,

You seem to be leading a very integrated life in Olathe, Kansas. It is but natural for India to change with times and every time we go back, it never fails to amaze me. And do you know what, when the plane starts circling above Bangalore, the floodgates brake and tears simply roll down my eyes to this day!!
How can we expect our kids to be like us? Are we like our parents?? My neices and nephews in India are all very chic and with it people. My daughters love to go out with them and enjoy the youth world out there.
I know, not everything is hunky dory either in India nor here. Life comes with its own problems. But then, we would have problems everywhere in one or the other form.
Enjoy your ABCD daughter...so says an ABCD Grandma:))) [Abroad But Confident Desi]

L, Kamla

Originally posted by Shobana

Thanks Kamla - you words are reassuring to me - as a mother, I guess I
always wonder if I have done everything right for my child. I know I
am not alone in thinking like this. For me, on arrival in India, I am
just jumping with joy - the floodgates open when I am leaving!! Oh well
- life goes on...

Shobana

Originally posted by Naazneen

Hey there,
Sunitha, I have to disagree with you opinion of what I meant when i wrote about "lack of communication (in a weird way)" helping make earlier immigrants stronger. My statement was about how it forced them to adapt.. under a stressful situation as opposed to the mollycoddling and soft assimilation we have the opportunities for in this information and relatively cheaper transportation age. I truly feel alot of respect for that generation of adults like Blondie and Shobhana.
I don't know how to explain it, this thread isn't about patriotism towards India or America. It was about talking about the truth that people who live abroad have to make alot of effort to get to know a foreign country-like it, its people and its ways. That doesnot mean one has to give up ones love for India. Its not a replacement thing. It just made me wonder how after spending soo much time,effort and heartache in one country- how one can call only India as one's homecountry? Also back then(in the threads) I was wondering about the worthiness of all this effort now I know better to just be patient.
~ Naazneen

Originally posted by newmommy

I am new here and this seems like an interesteing post.
I was in the US for 6 years after marriage (first year experimenting my
culinary skills on my hubby....next 1.5 yrs did a master and then 2.5
yrs working....1yr at home to take care of my baby)....... so in a way
I have been at home, went to school/work and again quit my job for my
son. Initially I used to sulk always and feel that past was better i.e
when I went there I missed India too and whenever I had a fight with my
hubby.... I would have a reason to miss my family even more....... we
have a big friend circle always but still I missed India/family a
lot....... but then I realised that its just in your mind...... the moment I
realised that I was happy and never complained....
Now one month back we relocated back to India but I do not see much of
a difference in lifestyle here i.e people are busy during weekdays and
everyone gets together on weekends (we are yet to make friends)......
so dear its just in yoru mindset........ try to be happy with wht you
have........
***************

I have posted all that I had - thanks everyone for forwarding me the posts that you had. Hopefully we can pick up where we left off.

Shobana

Well Shobana, that is a neat job you have done ! Thanks for getting the thread back to almost its original look.

L, Kamla

Dear friends
Inspired by the interesting discussion going on here I wanted to share my views/ thoughts on this topic.I am not experienced enough to comment on the pros and cons of settling abroad but as the spouse of a software professional with onsite opportunities I have been in the US for a couple of years,just long enough to understand the way things work there.

I would like to say that the US life and culture taught me ..
1.To learn to respect and love your solitude.
There is no use cribbing "I am all alone.don't know what to do.." instead make use of the opportunity to learn something useful and innovative using the net.

2.To become more religious and spiritual.
I was merely an observer before but the stint abroad developed an interest in me to know the signifance of each Hindu festival & celebrate it in the authentic way.

3. To be independent..To manage things ourselves without the luxury of external help as far as possible.
On the flipside..

Emotional insecurity.. the very thought that we are away from our near and dear ones gave a dull ache.I was particularly shattered by the death of a close relative whom I had met just
before leaving for US. Can we be of any solace to the family members of the deceased? All that we could do was shed tears and give a condolence phone call.

Medical blues..Immediate medical attention in emergency situation is a distant dream unlike India where superior care is given if one has VITAMIN M.(M-money,currency power of course)

In my honest opinion Life in India is definetely enjoyable with our parents and relatives in the vicinity ,domestic help at your door step, neighbourhood children to play with yours on a
daily basis..(reduces playdate appointment headaches!). Your choice.. socialise with neighbours or maintain a safe distance.. Parents and siblings to pamper you when sick or in need of
help.Excellent medical facilities with 24 hours helpline.(Is this why foreigners prefer treatment in Indian metros? Of course currency conversion is also taken into account.)
We are Indians at heart wherever we are right? Do we give up on Indian food if we settle down abroad? Our roots are in India wherever we may opt to go.As for ABCDs' parents need to
play an important role in making them understand our values right from birth, bring them home(India) every year especially around festivals like deepavali) to make them understand and respect our traditions.

A welcome trend now is.. Indians abroad are returning back to India for good.No parent wants to take a chance continuing to live abroad when children are growing.Afterall don't we want to raise our children the way we were raised?

Honeybee what a excellent explanation . I do agree with U 100%.

Hi honeybee

I agree with you completely... that you mite have noticed in my previous posts in this thread.

India has got so much to offer, living in aboad compromising on some big and small things... isnt worth it !!!.

~Abha

Hi Cheer
Thanks a lot for your "cheerful" compliments.

Regards
Honeybee