After 35 years and turning from age 25 to 60 is India still your home country?

Naazneen - received your posts. I have sent the ones that I had - unfortunately, I had them in my delete folder and had deleted them - the only ones I had were all posted on July 26th. I guess if I dont receive any more posts, I will assume that this is it and post them - first I have to figure out the order!! I will wait for a couple of days in case anyone has any posts in their emails - the threads may not make a lot of sense if we do no have all the posts - but hey, we will have to manage with what we have.

Shobana

I agree, lets just move on with what we have. The discussion can still be very interesting. I found the post sent by the lady who used to live in U.S and has now moved to the India also very interesting. Its nice to hear both sides. For example, my aunt whom I mentioned in my first post. I can't wait to meet up with her and ask her how she feels about moving back to India after sooo many yrs( i think 30) in the US. Ofcourse there is a tendency to speak positively about one's current situation. But still thats one meeting I'm really looking forward to for my next visit back to India. "visit back to India" - ironic isn't it- reminds me of back to the future tarantaran!!!!!!!!!!!!
~ Naazneen

Hello Friends, We haven't heard from Blondie yet right? Blondie, do you have any of the posts in this thread in your email inbox?

Shobana, Lets give a couple of days for Blondie to respond. Post that, you can update this thread with whatever you have. We can then continue the conversation. Thanks Shobana.

Hi Malathy

I did hear from Blondie - got a couple of posts - I waited to see if I would any more from others - I think I have all that we will get. What I will do is go through and organize them in the order and post each one separately and title it "Post from..." - and include the name of the poster. I will do that in the next couple of days.

Shobana

The topic was really ver provoking for Indian' living in abroad. I do agree with U ladies.

East or west India is the Best. Reason we born & brought up there, we loved our culture, people & friendly atmosphere. Here everything is mechanical. If u're in any problem like sick, i remembered last yr when i had miscarriage first of all medical facilities are disgusting. I can't sit due to miscarriage & still i have to wait there for atleast 2 hrs for my number. This happened when i went to emergency, afterwards here nobody to help us. I was on my bed rest & except my hubby we had no help & he doesn't know how to make roti's etc. So it's really tough if ure having some problem here. Nobody here to help U. Whereas in India when somebody moved in our neighbour, somebody sick or something happened we always help them. Here no, nobody interested. People here is really very cool, no sympathy etc.

I think no matter how long we stay here, we always go back to India for good.

Hi everyone,

There are two kinds of desi in USA. One who settle here itself and other who long for the Indian life they missed and want to return to India at any cost.(even after 25yrs)

Life in USA is not a piece of Cake, we miss a Lot(relatives, friends, functions and miss the dear ones when u r need them near)

I particulary feel bad abt not comunicating with all the relaives and friends( You know its not possible to call all the 30 relatives)

I was scared about the thought that will my relatives think that i am ignoring them. But i knew i am not doing that but the picture will become like that.

I wonder how they will react to me when i go back to India can they understand us or they will just ignore us...

I never wanted to leave India but life is not going to give me what i asked for...

so ladies do u feel the same when dealing with relatives or have a better idea to overcome this.

Do reply

Take care
Janaki

how did i missed this thread,

shobana --great work in collecting all the posts and am eagerly waiting for you to repost it again.


coming to me, i came here 1 nd half yrs back, at first i came to a small town in FL where there are not many indians and no friends. the very first week of my arrival i desperatly wanted to go back i felt that its like a punishment coming to US leaving all the loved ones. (may be if i got to know about IL it would have been different i guess) i dont know how the days passed and after 3 months we moved to NJ ( am very lucky at that moment) and u all know that NJ is like anyother city in INDIA, got some friends and cousins staying near by but the feeling of loneliness still lingers.

Naazneen,

there will be lot of change in the mindset living in a small town compared to the big city as i have faced it personally.i dont know exactly but i feel more relaxed, missing everyone is still there but not that desperate in going back at the moment.

Will definitely want to be back in INDIA for good in the near future.

Ok ladies - I have gone through all the posts and have tried to organize them. We are missing a few posts that were posted by me, Blondie and possibly others and hence it lacks continuity. I did the best I could. I will post each one separately and also identify who posted it orginally. Happy reading and would love to get feedback from the orginal posters as well as all the newcomers.

Shobana

Here is the first of the posts that I am recreating.

Originally posted by Abha

---Quote (Originally by Abha)---
Alrite, you need to change the tone of the discussion over here.

If you are accusing me of loving my country and my home land, then I
would rather not say anything to you, as you have totally lost it, cos
you, i'm sure have forgotten you own country...

I want to ask you one question ? What have you done to improve the bad
conditions which you are talking about, if you cant do anything dont
say anything ?

Anyways, you would be an American now, so leave it YOU wudnt understand
!!!
---End Quote---

Orginally posted by Blondie


My, My look who is setting the tone here.

My dear Abha I started out with asking for your forgiveness. I did not
accuse you of anything.

What is my contribution you ask??

I dentifying and acknowledging a problem is halfway to the solution my
dear.
I am not americanized at all. In fact I am the most Indian in my circle
of desi friends. I am an active participant of AID(association for
India's development) chapter through which we support the PURA initiative
of indian government. My husband is an active member of organisation
that raises funds for developing the district we come from. We have
contributed funds to modernise and expand the tiny school he has attended in
his village.

Patriotism is not vocally saying I love my country.

I do very well understand.

Sunitha, yes that was very bad on my part(misplaced humor). But does it
seem justified calling people ignorant?? Where as they are the most in
the know people seeing that coming from where they are they did very
well with out the opportunities that life in big cities provide like
good private schools, good food, good entertainment, technology
developments in par with US of A, etc. etc??

When people talk about high paying jobs in India is it among all the
sectors?? (I don't believe so) If so why are people still coming here in
droves?? Are the farmers also making enough to lead a happy contented
life??

acknowledged that gawar log don't spend much time in big cities but
they do spend enough time there to realise that the development has not
reached them where they live. Do they have to come to the cities to get
access to amenities?? unfortunately this is what is happening with
consequence of farmers abandoning their farming and moving to cities. DOES
any body have the long vision to foresee what this will result in??

Nazneen dear I am sorry that you feel so homesick sometimes. If
possible try spending few months back home during school's summer
break and see where you will be more happier. Life is too short to be
spending it with 'What ifs' and 'I/We should have done different'. Then
after that you will be better equipped to persuade yourself and your
husband either way.