Sumangali Prarthanai & Pondugal

Dear Chithra,

Could you please guide us on how Sumangali Prarthanai & Pondugal ceremonies?

Thanks and love
Pavithra

Dear Pavithra,
Last year a friend requested the same by P M . So I drafted them & have them ready.
I have the Thanjavur & palghat style in a broad format. There are bound to be minor differences in each family and place. You may get the details from elders.
But remember, if there is no one to guide you, you can follow this as a general procedure. I have checked up with elders and got their approval.
I take this opportunity to thank the I L ite who helped me with editing and final drafting. May God bless her & hers.
Love,
Chithra.

Originally Posted by chitvish

Dear Pavithra,
Last year a friend requested the same by P M . So I drafted them & have them ready.
I have the Thanjavur & palghat style in a broad format. There are bound to be minor differences in each family and place. You may get the details from elders.
But remember, if there is no one to guide you, you can follow this as a general procedure. I have checked up with elders and got their approval.
I take this opportunity to thank the I L ite who helped me with editing and final drafting. May God bless her & hers.
Love,
Chithra.

Chitra,

Amazing ways of ambal. I have been doing pondugal. but with the help of mil. then last 2 years husband's chitti helped but was not happy (Chitti has never done pondugal/attended one in my 14 years of marriage). i felt she made mistakes. so was actually thinking of asking you for a general procedure. we are from tanjavur (komal to be precise) to compare note.
I should really thank Pavithra, for asking this.

Love
shanthi

Dear Shanthi,
I am very happy to read your post. Now that you have done it with your MIl , you will know where exactly, there are changes in your family.
I plan to post it shortly.Thanjavur format is from my sambandi who hails from T proper.
Palghat is from my MIl & co-sister who are from there.
Love,
Chithra.

SUMANGALI PRARTHANAI- (PALAKKAD TRADITIONS)

Sumangali prarthanai is a combination of shubha and punya karmams, performed when there is a wedding in the family (either daughter or son),or before an auspicious function like poonal, seemantham etc.

If a female family member has passed away as sumangali, it is customarily performed on the day next to the devasam – annual function.

Suitable months
All the months except adi, markazi & purattasi

Suitable days?
Fri, wed- most ideal
Sun thurs & mon – secondary
Tue & sat – not done
Not performed on ekadasi, dvadasi, pournami, amavasai – because on these days, oil bath cannot be taken.

Saree

9 yards saree – no black, preferably yellow or red

On the previous day

On the day previous to the sumangali prarthanai, one must take the following:
oil, shikakai & manjal podi to the houses of all ladies who are participating. .
They must be requested to have oil bath with this & come to partake of food and wearing 9 yards saree.
Girls who have attained puberty, but are not married are usually not allowed to participate in the Sumangali Prarthanai.

To initiate proceedings on the day of Sumangali Prarthanai

This has to be done by the main lady conducting the sumangali prarthanai, before bath at 5 A . M.
At, 5 A M draw podi kolam on a palakai over kolam on the floor
Place saree & blouse on it.
In front, keep vethalai, pakku, manjal kizangu, all oil & shikakai
Smear drop oil on the saree, dot shikakai
Offer a namaskaram
That oil is to be used by all ladies of the house for bathing

No. of Pondugal

Minimum 7 – include one kanya pon . Should be odd no. The number of Sumngalis participating varies from 5 - 9.It depends on the house custom & how much space is available to put nuni elais.

Let us call the main palakai with saree as pudavaikalam.

Besides this odd no. of pondugal , 2 leaves (also called swami elai) are mandatory.

Before going for oil bath, now wash the saree & dry on the terrace.

Clean the place, now draw maakolam, after bath

Place on the maakolam the following- Palakai, 2 swami elais one on either side of pudavaikalam.

Draw separate kolams for all other .

On the palakai keep a mirror at the back & a marapachi in front of the mirror.

On the palakai over the marapachi, place the saree – make kosavams, tie & keep on palakai – blouse + other dresses like chithadai on the palaka or nearby

Decorate both the mirror & pudavai with flower garland & gold chain.

Near by, keep kumkum, chandanam,akshathai, uthiri poo, niraya poo, manjal, vethalai, pakku, Pancha pathram jalam, chukku vellam, panakam, maruthani, ( neer mor) , thengai pal,sombu jalam, bakshanam, fruits.
NB: neer mor is custom only in some families, not all.

Invite all ladies - request them to stand – give manja podi – ask them to apply it on the legs & wash. Make them stand in the hall, offer kumkum, chandanam, flowers &show arathi or kalpooram

Invite sappida vango - சாபிட வாங்கோ & make them sit

As far as possible keep all elais & arrange persons sitting, facing North & east. Next option is facing west. Facing south is avoided. This is determined by the space available.

Start serving from swami elai – round & clockwise direction

After serving all items ( including sadam & ghee); the main person, conducting should go near the main pudavai, collect flowers, akshathai, manjal & kumkum – pour 2 tsp water from panchapathram. , keep in the right hand. First take the hand round for first swami elai, pour down only the water – repeat round for all elais, finally come to the pudavai kalam & offer everything there.

Perform namaskaram facing palakai, to the saree etc.which signifies the sumangali.

Ask all family members also to offer flowers & do namskaram.

Kudikka neer:

First swami elai – one spoon near the elai for both elais.

Round for all ladies then 1 tsp to all ladies on their hand & also saying

‘Ellarum neer vangikkongu’

எல்லோரும் நீர் வாங்கிகோங்கோ

Finally come to swami elai & say ,
Arinjava ariyathava therinjava theriyathava ellarum vanthu saappidungo”

அறிஞ்சவா, அறியாதவா, தெரிஞ்சவா, தெரியாதவா எல்லோரும் வந்து சாப்பிடுங்கோ

Perform namaskaram.

Now sappadu can start.

Offer thengapal immediately after rasam sadam

Before they get up, offer 1 tbsp sombu water from near the pudavai elai to all ladies

After food:

Request everybody to sit together.

Offer panakam, chukku vellam,vethalai pakku etc dakshinai & finally maruthani

Permitted vegetables: All nattu vegs except drumstick, potato. Tomato is allowed இன் சொமெ ஹொஉசெச்.

Samayal
2 pachadi – one curd, one puli
2 kootu - one with & one without puli
2 curry - podithuval
Parikkai pitlai & morkuzambu
Ordinary rasam
Arisi- vellam - little pal - payasam (Rice is cooked & then jaggery is added. Remove & add milk enough to get the required consistency).
Thenga thogayal
Thick thayir
Ama vadai, neyyappam, poli ( optional)

Fruits:
First preference - Mango, jack fruit, banana, secondly others like apple, orange, sathukudi & grapes.

Love,
Chithra.

Sumangali Prarthanai – Thanjavur Tradition

Buy a 9 yds saree in silk or cotton. The preferable colours are red, yellow & green.
Including the “ pudavai kalam “ there can be 5 or 7 ( odd number)

Girls below 5 yrs & girls who have attained age, but are not yet married, are not allowed to sit. The daughters in law of the house also are not allowed to sit as “ pendukal” - this varies with families.

Daughters of the house & any other married ladies can sit.

For the participating ladies, go to their houses the previous day evening, give them kumkum, haldi, oil, shikakai, vasanai podi & invite them to come.

On the morning of the day, wash the 9 yds saree & a blouse piece with madi (shuddam)after bath & dry.The main person conducting the function should not take an oil bath.

Put a big kalyana kolam in the entrance, put semman & tie “ mavilai”.

For the pudavai kalam – put a square kolam, (padi kolam), over that keep a palakai & put kolam on that.

In front of that, put a kolam to keep the elai. On both sides of the pudavai kalam put kolam for 2 elais , beside for elais facing N, E & next preference W.

Fold the dry saree so that the “ pallu” comes on the top. The corner of the same should face N. Fold the blouse & keep on that. On the saree keep the following:

A small mirror

Oru kavuli ( 100 no:s) vethalai

Plenty of kali paakku

Plenty of urundai manjal

nalangu manjal – (mix of haldi & chunnambu) on a vethalai

12 bananas

10 yds malli, kathambam or roses

Maruthani on a vethalai

A ball of haldi & water on a vethalai

Chullu vella urndai in a vethalai

A gold chain

In a “ kudam” – water to which cardamom powder & dry ginger powder are added

One sombu of panakam

One sombu of neer mor

Coins to give ladies with vethalai pakku

On the kolam in front of pudavai kalam, put double nuni elai, one overlapping the other.

Nuni should face N.

On other kolams, place elais & “ kudikkum jalam”

Start before or after rahu kalam.

When the ladies arrive give them manjal mixed with water, to wash their legs, apply & come.

Then give them chandanam, kumkum & flowers & ask them to take their seat near the elais.

Offer al items on menu to the pudavai kalam first & hthen serve clockwise to other elais.

Show “ doopa deepam” to pudavai kalam first & then to all ladies.

The “ conducting person” should take in the hand akshathai & flowers, sprinkle below the pallu of the saree in the pudavai kalam & pay your respects( in mind) to all the deceased sumangalis of the family.

Show karpooram to the same.

Now offer a tsp jalam to the pudavai kalam & to all ladies in their hands.

They should drink it & start eating.

Nobody should get up halfway through.

After everybody finishes eating, again offer a tsp of water to thepudavai kalam & move the pallu corner to the N.

One of the daughters in law should eat the pudavai kalam sappadu.

After meals the ladies should be given naeer mor, panakam & chukku vellam.

Then smear haldi on their legs & put nalangu.

Offer flowers, maruthani, chandanam & kumkum.

In a plate keep lot of vethalai, pakku, gundu manjal, coconut, kumkum bharani, comb, mirro, coin, 2 bananas, blouse piece – keep in their paLLU.

Give akshathai in their hand, do namaskaram & ask them to blless you.

After the person who conducts has eate, she must give the saree to a poor woman who also is asked to eat. ( I think this varies in each house)

Samayal:
Paruppu payasam - thayir pachadi - vella pachadi - vazakkai curry - avarai or kothavarai curry - poosani kootu - pitlai - mor kuzambu - thani kootu - kadalai paruppu sugar kosemalli - paasiparuppu savoury kosemalli - coriander thogayal - ginger, mango pickle - curry leaf thogayal - rasam - banana, mango, jackfruit - ulundu vadai - sojji appam - thengai sadam - lemon rice - kalathukku paruppu - ghee - curds - honey

Love,
Chithra.

Dear Chith,
Fantastic and amazing;
Regards,
Meenu

Dear eenu,
Thankyou very much for the very prompt F B.
Again, I repeat, I owe it to the blessed soul who edited it for me patiently. May her tribe increase.
Love,
Chithra.

Dear Chithra,

This information is too good and fantastic..:) Am feeling so good after getting these details...

Thanks and love
Pavithra

Dear Pavithra,
You are welcome ! Thankyou for the feedback.
Love,
Chithra.