Things to Ponder

Can you cry under water?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two
hours or so?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated
instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in" but it's only a "penny for your
thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried
in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a
good idea to put wheels on luggage?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you *IN* a movie, but you're *ON* TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars
to look at things on the ground?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible
crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut,
why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both
dogs!

If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't
he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables,
what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you,
but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?

Do you ever wonder why you gave me your e-mail address in the first place?

Dear Heena,

You make me smile with your jokes and through me many others.

Thanks a lot.