Marital Woes

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.

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Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.

Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.

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Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?

It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!

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Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?

Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

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It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged.

It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered

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It is difficult to understand GOD . He makes such beautiful things as women and then he turns them into Wives

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If u r married please ignore this MSG,

For everyone else: Happy Independence Day

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Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say.

After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish.

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There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage

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Galfriends r like chocolates,
Taste gud anytime.

Lovers r like PIZZAS, Hot n spicy, eaten frequently.
Wife r like Dal RICE, eaten when there`s no choice

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Man receives telegram: Wife deadshould be buried or cremated?

Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

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Prospective husband: Do you have a book called 'Man, The Master of Women'?

Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.

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Q: Why dogs don't marry?

A: Because they are already leading a dog's life!

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There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he would go through hell for her. They got married and now he is going thru hell.

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Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your life!

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Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman?

A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offence!

hi chek this-HI-TECH MARITAL WOES


Solution to software problem

Ms. Kala Gopal
Ph.25533276



Dear Tech Support Team:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0.

I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child-processes
that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife
1.0
installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other
system activities.

Applications such as Bachelor Nights 10.3, Cricket 5.0, Beer With
Buddies 7.5, and Outings 3.6 no longer runs, crashing the system
whenever selected.
I cant seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run
my favorite applications.

I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 5.0 , but the 'uninstall'
doesnt work on Wife 1.0.

Please help!

Thanks, "A Troubled User"




REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that people complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking! that it
is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an AUTOMATED
PROGRAMME and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!!

It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend
5.0.

It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the
system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 5.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed not
to
allow this. (Look in your Wife 1.0 Manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child
Support) .

I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the
environment.

I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate
software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because
ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the
system
will
return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance.
Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean 2.5, Sweep
3.0,
Cook 1.5 and Do Laundry 4.2. However, be very careful how you use these
programs.
Improper use will cause the system to launch the program NagNag 9.5.

Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0
is to purchase additional software. I recommend Saree 2.1 and Jewellery
5.0

STATUTORY WARNING : DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary
With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and
will
cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,

Tech Support ...