One Liners

One Line Humor

[1] Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them whiledriving.

[2] Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.

[3] Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right andthe other is the husband!

[4] I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried - but theywanted cash.

[5] A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you'vepurchased new school uniforms.

[6] Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.

[7] Don't marry the person you want to live with, marry the one youcannot live without, but whatever you do, you'll regret it later.

[8] You can't buy love, but you pay heavily for it.

[9] Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

[10] Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.

[11] Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'lltake it anyway.

[12] My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she agreeswith me.

[13] Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others.

[14] Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.

[15] A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.

[16] You're getting old when you enjoy remembering things more thandoing them.

[17] It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he stillends up with the same boss.

[18] Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between addressbooks.

[19] Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.

[20] Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talkbecause they have to say something

[21] They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldomgets to speak!

[22] Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but then the thought of long life will never come.


[23]Why do couples hold hands during their wedding? It's a formalityjust like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!

[24]Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

[25]It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged. It's like
asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.

[26]There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother hasit.

[27]There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbor hasit!