Discover the 90/10 Secret

Hey Ladies,

I received this as a forwarded mail and really enjoyed reading it. Thought provoking one and it is really worth to be applied in life.

May be some of you would have had a chance to read it already, still thought of sharing it here for the benefit of everyone.

Happy reading...

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Understand and apply the 90/10 secret. It will change your life!

What is this secret?
10% of life is made up of what happens to you.
90% of life is decided by how you react.
What does this mean?

We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us.
We cannot stop the car from breaking down.
The plane may be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off.
A driver may cut us off in traffic.
We have no control over this 10%.
The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%!
How? By your reaction.

You cannot control a red light, but you can control your reaction.
Don't let people fool you, YOU can control how you react!
Let's use an example....

You're eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a
cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what
just happened. What happens next will be determined by how you react.
You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the coffee cup
over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your
spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of
the table.

A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your
shirt. Back downstairs you find your daughter has been busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit. You get caught by the police who charges you a fine.

After a 15 minute delay and throwing $60..... You look forward to
going to office. In the evening, when you arrive home you find small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter.

Why? Because of how you reacted in the morning.

Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the Policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?

The answer is D.

You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted
in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day.

Here is what could have and should have happened. Coffee splashes over
you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say "It's OK honey, you
just need to be more careful next time".

Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and
your briefcase. You come back down in time look through the window and
see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You and your
spouse kiss before you both go to work. You arrive 5 minutes early and
cheerfully greet the staff.

Notice the difference.
Two different scenarios. Both started the same.
Both ended different.

Why? Because of how you REACTED.

You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens.
The other 90% is determined by your reaction.

Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 secret.
If someone says something negative about you, do not be a sponge.
Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You don't have to let the
negative comment affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your
day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired,
getting stressed out, etc.

How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic? Do you lose your
temper? Pound the steering wheel? (A friend of mine had the steering
wheel fall off!) Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Do
you try and bump them? WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at
work? Why let the blue car ruin your drive?

Remember the 90-10 principle, and do not worry about it! You are told
you lost your job. Why lose sleep or get irritated? It will work out.
Use your "worrying" energy and time into finding another job.

The plane is late. It is going to mangle your schedule for the day.
Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no
control over what is going on. Use your time to study, get to know the
other passenger, etc. Why get stressed out? It will just make things
worse.

You now know the 90-10 secret.
Apply it and you will be amazed at the results.

"Minds are like parachutes, they function best when open"

Hi Sonu,

It is a very good article, thanks for sharing. I remember the quote by

Thomas Alva Edison, Life is 10% inspiration and 90% perspiration.

I agree with the last words- Mind is like a parachute, functions best

when open.

Vidyalakshmid,
why are you scaling down Edison? he said genius is 99% prespiration and 1% inspiration
varalotti

The world would be an utopia if every person on this earth followed this hypothesis. We have seen the instance of a petty family squabble due to uncontrolled reactions in Sonu's post. Even the worst human caused disasters in this world could have been evaded if people involved would have applied the 90/10 secret before taking extreme actions which hurt the innocent. Things are tougher to be done, but atleast let us all start applying it with our spouses and children to start with and thank sonu for sharing the secret with us.

Hi Sonu,

Thanks for sharing the 90/10 secret. You won't believe, I felt so guilty reading this article. I used to get so annoyed and loose my temper quickly on my little one. Then I used to feel bad the whole day and as rightly explained in the article, the whole day would become sloppy not just for me but everyone at home.

Hi Prathi,

As you have pointed out rightly, this world would have been much safer place if everybody had applied this secret to their reactions. It is difficult as you said, but good to start applying the secret atleast within our home.