Newly Married - Questions about Intimacy!

Just a thought Flyingkite - the wetness is due to arousal, so decreasing foreplay may help.

Vanathi

hey she says there is hardly any foreplay but she felt maybe her vaginal muscles are weak so I suggested to chek up with gync. She did but doc said its not and due to her shyness she dint ask any other intimate qs.
Thanks for the response though.

TC

Flyingkite,
Ask your sis to see if any of the suggestions in this help:

Excess Vaginal Wetness - All You Need To Know

Vanathi.

flyingkite, ask your sis to do kegel exercise, 10 times at once. Search about the exercise in google. It really helps.
My sister is a gyn. she tells me to do it, during my pregnancy time.
It helps strengthening the pelvic muscle.

HI Cindhuja,
what you've mentioned is very very normal for the new bride, considering that you were with a joint family for sometime and you had just few chance to get intimate with your hubby.
Now you're alone with your dh, so start the things by having some foreplay and never think about pain which will happen next and enjoy that moment. Then make love.
Even I had trouble in such things, but we sorted out by having talks with hubby for hours and by getting some tips from gyn. All set now :)
Once you start enjoying, then in no time you'll be able to share the good news.

Good luck.
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Originally Posted by Cindhuja

Hi all,

Just today i came across this section. Even i face many problems everyday, would wonder if anybody can advice about it. None of my close frenz are married, hope someone can help me with this.

Itz an yr since we got married but nothing has happened till now, and i am the main reason behind it. I dont co-operate much. First reason was for the initial 1 yr of our married life we were a joint family, so i was afraid if someone could hear me crying or scream so i didnt cooperate much and move away for a small pain.

Now wehave moved to a new place and still i am the same. I have heard few of my frenz saying abt the pain and read in books. So i am really afraid to face it. I do understand it is part of life, but i am not able to bear in the intial stage itself.

My husband is very sweet, he has not even uttered a word nor shown a bad expression not even a sigh. I dont want to take advantage of it.

Sometimes i try to bite my teeth and bear, but i guess my muscles become more tough and firm when i do so and increases the pain more.

What am i to do? How to get rid of this fear? Are there any gels to soothe the pain? I am not at all aware of those. Someone Plz do help me.

When my In-laws and Parents ask if we have any gud news, i really feel guilty. How cud i say i havn't undergone a sex life at all? My aunt is a doctor whenever i speak with her she used to advice me abt my age and ask me to plan for a kid asap, since it may complicate the further related matters.

Can anybody help with this.

Thanks all.Hope i get rid of that fear soon.

Originally Posted by Cindhuja

Hi,

Thanks for ur reply, but i suppose u hav misunderstood what i mentioned. There's nothing wrong physically, the problem is mentally i am not ready to face the pain. Anywways thanks for ur suggestion.

hi Cindhuja,
come on yaar this pain is for somedays. after some days u will enjoy it . see ur husband is also adjusting with u so u should also bear little pain for him . after some time when ur pain is gone then i am sure u urself will start askin ur husband for this ;)
when i had it first time time i was also scared of pain . in the mornin i saw scratches all over my husband´s body. this happened at night when i was tryin to avoid him.
after after 5- 6 days it was normal .
SO GO AHEAD AND DO IT ;)

Shalu

Hello IL Ladies,

I was just going through thread and found very informative .

I am married for past 2 years and been using KY Jelly till now. We have tried to do without it but I don't get wet so we always end up using KY. I am trying to conceive and If I understand right from thread, KY is not really recommeneded for conceiving. So is there any other lubricants that I can use if I want to conceive (both in India and US) ?? I have heard sthing called Pre-seed in US market. Has anyone used it ??

Pre-seed can be ordered from earlypregnancytest.com

I've used it but not a great fan . I think my doc told me you can use egg whites instead as well.

Originally Posted by ashapradeep

And I get so depressed when I get my periods. Since I am hoping I am pregnant, I get all these symptoms which I realise I am imagining. Can anyone tell me for sure what symptoms to expect??

Advice plz and pray for me!!!

Hey Asha, thinking too much about something can create a lot of stress which can affect your health, especially when you're TTC. You've been married only an year so take it easy and let it happen on its own. The more you fret, the more it will slow down your performance and the chances of getting pregnant.

Since your periods are not on a regular basis, the one easy method that you can use to predict ovulation is taking basal body temperature. It's a technique of taking your temperature, usually, first thing in the morning and charting the temp and then finding out when you're ovulating. My periods were really irregular and because of my blod clot history I can't take any estrogen containing BC, so I opted for the FAM method (Fertility Awareness Method) to first avoid pregnancy and then later to achieve pregnancy and I am going to continue it. I am not doing it currently as I am BFing because of which my body doesn't really predict the right temp. Anyway, if you need more info, you can go here Ovusoft Fertility Awareness Primer.

The other option will be to get an ovulation predictor kit, never used it personally though. Good luck and don't worry. Sending some baby vibes your way ....

Raj