Trying to Conceive: Support group for Women

Hey

Sometimes the trick is to just relax and de-stress. I'm telling you this because I myself was very stressed out while trying to concieve. I always thought about getting pregnant, I had no other thoughts. Then I took an aunt's advice and started pursuing a hobby, I took a painting class ... it kept my mind away from all this. Sometimes just being happy and relaxed helps a lotttt.

Also do see another doctor for a second opinion.

Sometimes losing a couple of pounds/kgs also helps. Start eating healthy and work out a little. Maybe take a walk with a friend or something like that.

Good Luck
CoolMommy

Hi all,

I just wanted to post because I am feeling kind of sad. I am feeling sad because I've not conceived yet. You see, my BIL(husband's younger brother)'s wife is pregnant and all preparations are being done for the seemantham(9th month ceremony). With my father-in-law passing away recently, all the responsibilities have fallen to me and my husband. We do not mind the responsibilities one bit and want to do our best. But the way some folks look at me when I am going about these duties, their unasked question of why we do not have a kid yet gleaming in their eyes.........well I feel I will not be able to hold on till the seemantham gets over. I have never bothered about what others will think till now.....but somehow this issue seems to affect me a lot. Sometimes I myself feel emotional in the course of the seemantham work. For example, I went and got "jadai" for my BIL's wife today and I have been feeling emotional since.....it is not that I begrudge her or something,. I am very happy for my BIL and his wife. And my MIL and SIL too know about my PCOS and are very supportive too. But still sometimes I cannot seem to control the tears that keep flowing. My husband and I are undergoing fertility treatments and are hoping that something will work for us soon.....My husband, sweet fellow, keeps telling me not to worry, but I do get so dejected at times. Right now he is not here and so I do not have a shoulder to cry on tonight.....thats why the recourse to dear IL. I know you folks will understand me. I hope I too get a baby soon.

With high hopes,
Anitha

P.S: Thank you all for having read this post. Writing it all out has made me feel slightly better.

Oh Anita,

Please don't feel bad dear. I know exactly what you are going through. Iam gald that atleast you've shared your hard feeling with us. Don't worry, as your husband says. Thanks to god that you have such a wondeful husband, MIL & SIL. Sure your baby is still on the making phase and waiting for the right time to get in you. God is great. I remember you went through the ovarian drilling and the process went well. So, just keep hoping for the best and leave the rest to god. You have a golden heart to do all these seemantham work for your orpadi, it's really amazing. Belevie me, it's all counted on your account with god.

Keep trying and you will suceed. I know it's very simple to say, but very hard to go through. I wish you all the best on all your attempts. Now cheer up sweet girl.

Dear Aabhi,

You are a real sweetheart! It was very surprising for me to see that you remember about my ovarian drilling. Wow! It is true that I am really blessed to get such in-laws. And yes, we are hoping and trying Hope everything goes well. And soon.......... Thanks again Aabhi, for lifting my spirits.

Regards,
Anitha

Originally Posted by Aabhi

Oh Anita,

Please don't feel bad dear. I know exactly what you are going through. Iam gald that atleast you've shared your hard feeling with us. Don't worry, as your husband says. Thanks to god that you have such a wondeful husband, MIL & SIL. Sure your baby is still on the making phase and waiting for the right time to get in you. God is great. I remember you went through the ovarian drilling and the process went well. So, just keep hoping for the best and leave the rest to god. You have a golden heart to do all these seemantham work for your orpadi, it's really amazing. Belevie me, it's all counted on your account with god.

Keep trying and you will suceed. I know it's very simple to say, but very hard to go through. I wish you all the best on all your attempts. Now cheer up sweet girl.

Hi Ridge,

Thanks 4 ur reply.... As am new to this forum, i didnt wrote much in my first post.... here is wat happened for the past 6 months..... i had severe abdominal pain during ovulation for the first 3 months, then i consulted a gyn couple of months back.... she has given me a 5 days antibiotic course, n as a result am not having the abdominal pain for the past 2 months.... then she asked me take a urine test, the test result stated that i was affected by a Urinary Tract Infection, and for tat too she has given tablets for 5 days..... i don have any prob wit my periods till now.... i felt comfortable after tat treatment, n this month i didnt find any pain or abnormality in me till my ovulation period ends..... my usual period last long for 28 days.... but this month it lasts for 35 days.... am very much upset n depressed abt it..... my sister in law got married 3 months back, n now she is pregnant, i feel sad when i think abt it, feel like dying sometimes, i could not tolerate my mother-in-law's words.... she is torturing me every month, she is asking so many questions..... anyone, pls help me , pls, pls, am very much depressed, my husband also very much interested to have a kid, n me too..... pls give some tips for me to conceive soon..... we are having contact every month during ovulation.....

by,
GVC

Hi Anitha,
You must be a real good person to do all the preparations for your orpadi inspite of your sadness. May God bless you. Be happy and just don't care for other people's hurting words or gestures. You know that you are doing the correct thing. That is enough and God is watching you for your good work.

Hemadurga,

Thank you for your kind words. It sure makes me feel better.

Regards,
Anitha

Dear GVC

I am also under the same course of treatment. My gyn has also prescribed me antibiotics and . I was one of the most uncooperative patients that a doctor could have.I hate injections.But now I have to check my sugar and thyroid, for which I need to get punctured every month.Now I laugh at myself for creating panic all around, at the sight of a needle.But I realise, that these experiences make me stronger.

Dear GVC, I have only one word for you at this time. Decide your priorities.Whom/what are you going to address first ? What is troubling you? Is it your in-laws, or your long hours at the job or others getting pregnant??? Clarity in this will pave way for your peace, I feel

If you are going to multi task your emotions for everything at this time, frustration will be the end. You cannot live your SIL's life nor can she do your's.Everyone's life is different.And, my gyn told to shed this anxiety of pregnancy, first."Pregnancy is not fast food.The body will take its own time, for things to fall in place". These are the words she quoted.

Me too feel irrriatated when people ask "Enna innum snannam pandriya, innum kulikkariya". I ward them off by a smile.Can't do a thing about it.But I know at the bottom of my heart, will have a healthy kid soon.Hope is the key.Please don't lose heart by succumbing to abuses that this soceity casts on us.Keep trying and keep on trying.Interact with people with positive vibes.Minimise the time you spend with your in-laws.

Sorry, if this is a long, advisory post.

Wish to see you write a positive, cheerful post !!!

Luv

Ridge

Originally Posted by GVC

Hi Ridge,

Thanks 4 ur reply.... As am new to this forum, i didnt wrote much in my first post.... here is wat happened for the past 6 months..... i had severe abdominal pain during ovulation for the first 3 months, then i consulted a gyn couple of months back.... she has given me a 5 days antibiotic course, n as a result am not having the abdominal pain for the past 2 months.... then she asked me take a urine test, the test result stated that i was affected by a Urinary Tract Infection, and for tat too she has given tablets for 5 days..... i don have any prob wit my periods till now.... i felt comfortable after tat treatment, n this month i didnt find any pain or abnormality in me till my ovulation period ends..... my usual period last long for 28 days.... but this month it lasts for 35 days.... am very much upset n depressed abt it..... my sister in law got married 3 months back, n now she is pregnant, i feel sad when i think abt it, feel like dying sometimes, i could not tolerate my mother-in-law's words.... she is torturing me every month, she is asking so many questions..... anyone, pls help me , pls, pls, am very much depressed, my husband also very much interested to have a kid, n me too..... pls give some tips for me to conceive soon..... we are having contact every month during ovulation.....

by,
GVC

Hi all,

A rude shock woke me up this morning - I got my periods!!! I am feeling really depressed as this is my second cycle of IUI. A second cycle that has failed! I do not know what is happening to me. I know Pooja(pmahensa) has asked us to take lots of rest after IUI but I was unable to because I had to do the seemantham work for my BIL's wife. I do not know what to do. It is so depressing. My husband says everything will be fine soon and not to worry but I am finding it extremely difficult to relax. I just hope the next cycle works! I can do nothing now but hope the next cycle will work. I hope I too will carry a life in me soon. Thanks for listening to me, my dear friends.

Regards,
Anitha

Dear Anitha A

Very sad to hear your news. I have read all your posts in this forum.As Pooja said, ample rest and stress free life is a key to good pregnancy.Please take care in your next IUI cycle. there is a saying in tamil (thankku minjithaan dhaanamum dharmamum). I think this applies to doing help also.I thought you are helping your BIL's wife seemantham under normal conditions.Never knew that you are doing it after your IUI cycle.When you need to take care of yourself, how can you handle stress by doing others jobs? This may fetch you a title of being broad minded but just think of the stress your body and mind undergoes.I also felt a little angry of y this lady strained herself inspite of having IUI.

Please do not think I am asking you to refrain from your duties and being selfish.At this moment, we cannot help, but to be selfish and self centric.I felt sad on hearing your IUI didnt work out because of lack of ample rest.If the cycle failed due to other biological reasons, then it is beyond human control.I vent my emotions so much for you, because me too sail inthe same boat as yours awaiting signs of pregnancy every month.Forget the whole world and take rest.Please, please take care in your next IUI. I am sorry, if I have told something that has hurt or misundertood your intentions for your family.

May I know the reason why you underwent IUI ?? I had uterine fibroids and underwent laprotomy and endotomy to remove them. My doc has prescribed medicines for 3 months for natural conception. ALso told taht one of my tubes are blocked.IF I don't conceive within 3 months, I have to undertake IVF, she told.I came to know IUI is a less complex proceudre comapared to IVF, less painful too. Can a person with one blocked tube undergo IUI or is IVF the only resort?

Pls throw some light.

Luv

Ridge