I think too much about what others think of me

Dear Friends,

I am not sure whether this thread fits the forum. But i am writing this because it also helps for personal growth.

I have this problem about thinking about what others think of me. It has been there for quite sometime. Actually, these are the people whom i rarely get to meet or talk say for eg a relative who keeps snubbng you or a person whom you meet probably not more than 2 times in a year.

I try to waste time thinking about them. I do not know why I do this to myself. I have good friends and strong family support who keeps me happy but still i waste lot of time thinking about few people whom i dislike. I want to come out of this situation.

Please help me by advicing me strongly...the more i tend to evade such thoughts the more i waste my time in thinking about them.

Thanks

Dear, I am not sure how to help you stop thinking such thoughts, because it is only you who can do that. If you love reading books read some of the self help books like those of robin Sharma, Paulo Coelho etc. Most of Paulo Coelho’s characters don’t care what others think of themselves. Robin Sharma mentions in a book of his that 95% of thoughts we have are useless and worthless but very few people understand that fact. Now you have understood it and is willing to get rid of it, I really appreciate that dear. Those people who talks nasty about others don’t have nothing else to do but this and always keep in mind that stones are thrown only to a tree which bears fruits. This is your life and you have every right to enjoy it cent percent (obviously without hurting others). So enjoy your moments and never care to think about those people of yours. This doesn’t mean you should be closed to criticism, being a matured person I think you know what all should we take in and what all we shan’t. Always be open to criticism but if you think this is the way you like it being done then do it so. But be sensibleJ Hope this helps you.

Thanks Ami. That was quick. I am a fan of Robin Sharma and I keep listening to all self help speeches and motivation talsk. Actually, it helps me only for that instant and after sometime i get back to usual unwanted thoughts. Actually i think the saying is right for me " idle mind is a devils workshop" i am not saying i think bad for others but i end up putting too much pressure on myself on livng up to other people expections than following my own heart.

I know that it is possble only by me to control what i think. Thank you very much for the effort Ami.

HI dear,

first let me say that stop doing wasteful thinking and wasting your precious time thinkingabout people who don't addvalue to your life, let them think what they want to hink about you, does it hurt you? no them leave it, if you start ignoring those thoughts you will be ablr to work moreo n yourselfand focus on things you are doing.
I have relatives who think and talk bad about because i am not married buti don't let it get to me i just laugh it off, becasue i don;t let them hurt me, people will always think ill about someoen else if htey see that person being successful in life so my advice divert your mind if they meet you say hi hello and move on.

love
alpa

Sreejitha, you are not alone - we live in a society and it is a natural tendency. But it should not become the driving /disturbing force for you as person. The fact that you realise this as an issue, as amihere mentioned is the first step. What has helped me is to deliberatly stop the thought right there - either by counting to 10 or reciting a small shloka. This helps you first to be aware of the thought and second that you are stopping it. You will soon begin to appreciate the liberation. Over time, you would have masterd it. Good luck.

between the hater & the hated, it is always the hater who gets hurt more.

Originally Posted by Sreejitha

Dear Friends,

I am not sure whether this thread fits the forum. But i am writing this because it also helps for personal growth.

I have this problem about thinking about what others think of me. It has been there for quite sometime. Actually, these are the people whom i rarely get to meet or talk say for eg a relative who keeps snubbng you or a person whom you meet probably not more than 2 times in a year.

I try to waste time thinking about them. I do not know why I do this to myself. I have good friends and strong family support who keeps me happy but still i waste lot of time thinking about few people whom i dislike. I want to come out of this situation.

Please help me by advicing me strongly...the more i tend to evade such thoughts the more i waste my time in thinking about them.

Thanks

Hi
I was like that when I was a housewife and once I got a good job, I became really busy with work and home that I dont really care about what others think.
I read somewhere that its a symptom of low self esteem. So set a goal and achieve it you will not be troubled about what others think and you will feel confident.