Hello October 2008 Mommies!!

Hi Friends!!

I am due on 11th October 2008. This is our first baby .

I wanted a 3 yrs gap between my marriage and pregnancy. By gods grace I am now pregnant after 3 yrs of my marriage and I feel so lucky for this. I used to kinda dislike kids/babies(I have my reasons) on the contrary my husband is crazy about kids. But now when I am pregnant I feel so much love, affection, attraction and all the good emotions for babies. Its really incredible for me. God is really GREAT!!

I am in my first trimester and suffering from nausea and weakness a lot . Everybody else my husband, my parents, in laws are so excited because this is the most awaited (3 years) good news for them. Just a single sentence like "I am not feeling well" makes them so worried about me. I am enjoying all this extra attention and care.

I miss India a lot these days because I used to work in India and here I am a housewife so whole day I stay alone at home. So now totally bored with this kinda life without relatives and friends here in US . I am planning to go back to India for delivery but my husband cant come with me due to his work. So that would be a problem for both of us. Now I am in dilemma whether to go back to India for delivery or should I stay here. Please Help me in taking a decision!!

So this was my story and I invite all the october mommies, Lets share our stories, problems, solutions, experiences etc. etc. in this thread.

You are Welcome!!
V n baby

Hi Vnbaby,
Congrats. I can understand how much you'd like your near dear ones to be close to help you, take care of you and even pamper you. Can your parents or in-laws not come here to help you during the last few weeks of pregnancy and continue to stay after delivery? We are in a similar boat too but we decided to stay here for delivery as it might be best for both mother's and baby's health and safety. This is a major disadvantage of staying so far away from family but then again we all have to go on with out lives, don't we? Of course each one's decision should depend on personal preference and doctor's advice. So take care and rest well. I too have nausea every now and then but there are other new problems or issues with every month - so rest while you can and try to recuperate for the long days ahead.

I'm going to be a home maker in couple weeks too and am already making a list of things to keep me occupied. I have never stayed at home before this for long periods of time so this is going to be a different experience. Why not try and volunteer in some activity or place in your neighborhood? Or may be even take up hobby classes in the near by craft shops? Good luck and hope you feel better soon.
-L.

Hi Vnbaby,
Congratulations!
Nice to hear'October mummies'.If you feel like being with your parents, they can come here and stay with you instead of you going all the way to India leaving your husband. Gardening(very very lightly) listening to music, handworks, reading, ...there are so many things you can do.I f you are planning to work after delivery, you can utilise this time to learn new recipes,go through others' parenting experiences etc. You will really enjoy motherhood! Be happy and you will enjoy everything you do.
My son was born on OCT 11th 20 years back-Such a charming, affectoinate, calm personalities Librans are.....
Love
Meena

Hi Friends!!

First of all thanks for your advices!! We are thinking about it whether to go back to India or to stay here. Will definitely inform you about our decision.

Yeah Lavanya I am quite bored of sitting at home specially now when I feel extremely weak and nauseous whole day and due to this I just dont feel like going out because that makes me more tired and sick so I am totally confined within my house . In this situation I really miss India because I dont have anybody even to talk to (because I havent told any of my friend here about my pregnancy and I shall tell them after completing my first trimester) except my husband and he has to go to office also during daytime. And even if I tell my friends they are not going to take care of me like my in-laws or parents would take care . So overall I am feeling really low these days because I used to always enjoy a good health and this nausea and weakness are just unbearable for me.

Meena ji I appreciate your advices of keeping myself busy with some activities. But as I have mentioned above I just dont have energy for these activities otherwise I used to keep myself busy with activities like you have told me. I used to cook different dishes, and what not but now any strong smell of cooking makes me more sick . Slowly I am losing confidence in myself that if starting stage of pregnancy can make me this much sick then will I be able to give birth to my baby.

This was my share of ranting .....rest is fine .

V n baby

Dear v n Baby,
Very sorry for the late reply.Pls don't lose confidence.You are going to be ferfectly alright and deliver a sweet baby.Vomitings and some discomforts are common in the initial stages and you will feel better later.Some breathing exercises can relieve you in later months. There are many threads with lots of informations on this.Hope u have gone through all.
All the Best!
Love
Meena

Hi V n baby,
Hope is the only thing we have in life, so NEVER lose it. Remember we make our lives so take the initiative to keep yourself occupied. The more you think you are sick the more its going to bring you down. Being tired isn't the end of life - its just natural and more so right now as you have another life growing inside of you. I have enrolled myself in different hobby classes just to pass my time and see my hand at it. Although they are only preview classes at least I will know whether I will like it enough to continue or not. You don't have to talk to your friends about your pregnancy but you can still call them and talk about general things. Make it a point to leave your house at least for 15- 20 mins even if its only for a walk in the community every day or alternate days. You cannot stay sad and depressed you have to make the effort to change your attitude. Borrow books from your library and read anything of interest to you. Visit various websites and browse and make lists of all the stuff you'll need for your baby and compare prices and find good bargains though you don't have to purchase immediately. There's always something that needs to be that we are putting off claiming some excuse so now is the time to do - just relax but enjoy what you do.

-L.

Hi Meena ji and Lavanya,

I am sorry for being late in replying to you both. As you know I am not feeling good due to nausea and tiredness but now as I am in my 12th week so feeling a bit better now .

Meena ji thanks for your concern and for your private message I felt really good after reading it but I couldnt reply back to you.

After thinking a lot about each and every aspect we have decided that I will go to India for delivery . Neither my MIL nor my mom can come for my delivery so if i will stay here handling everything ourselves would be a big problem. Because I have seen some pregnancies and post partums in my family and learnt from all the elders that one needs really good care and proper rest after delivery otherwise one has to suffer really bad impacts on one's health later in life . And there are many other reasons so we have decided to deliver in India.

Lavanya thanks a lot for your suggestions. Keeping myself busy is not a problem for me if I feel good. But when I am not feeling good I become cranky like a baby . Actually am a youngest kid of the family so I am really a pampered one. Actually I didnt expect that much of weakness and nausea during pregnancy as nobody in my family like my elder sister, my bhabhi, my SIL, my cousin.....never suffered from all these symptoms and there first trimester was not that tough.....so I used to think that I can also handle my pregnancy without my parents or in-laws. But now ......My GOD!! Only after handling it for 11 weeks, nausea and weakness made me so emotionally and physically vulnerable that I am dieing to see my whole family .

Also I have read it on internet that If a woman generally enjoys a good health and is normally an active person she tends to feel more weak and tired during first trimester. I am normally a healthy and active person so I think that could be the case with me. How true it is can anybody shed some light?

Take care
V n baby

Hi Friends!!

Am I the only one whose EDD is in October. No other members for October mommies club???

Great that you are feeling a little better now. When are you planning to go back to India? Definitely you will feel better with your family around you. As for the active women feeling weaker it was certainly not true for me - I worked all through my first trimester (including nights on call) and while I felt tired I never had that much nausea/vomiting and had the energy to work full-time and cook and run the house as always. Its just different for differnet people!

Vanathi.

Hello Vnbaby,

"a woman generally enjoys a good health and is normally an active person she tends to feel more weak and tired during first trimester"

I dont think this is true.My sister is one of the most active person i have ever seen.She is a manager at an MNC in india and even during her pregnancy she was working and she used to cook and run the house also.She had infact been to europe for projects also during her pregnancy.She had some minor complaints like nausea and back ache,i think it is different for different people.
She now has a healthy and active baby boy of 5 months

suji