What will I do without you!

Forty years ago, on 2^nd September 1969 to be precise, two computers at the University of California, Los Angeles, exchanged some data in the first test of the Advanced Research Projects Agency Network (ARPANET), an experimental military network. This exchange was the seed of what would become the most advanced communications network in all of human history: the Internet. Forty is the age when men and perhaps women too, are reported to get naughty. If this rule applies to Internet too, God knows where it will end! It is hard to imagine internet getting any naughtier than today.

The birth of the child called Internet that would become indispensible for the world subsequently went unnoticed in 1969. I can only compare it to the birth of Lord Krishna on a dark, rainy night that went unnoticed until His exploits started in the house of His foster mother Yasodha. People became aware of Internet only in the 70’s with the ushering in of TCP/IP communication protocol that allowed multiple networks to connect and the advent of email. But Internet became a household name only in the 90’s after a British physicist, Tim Berners-Lee, invented the Web, a subset of the Internet that makes it easier to link resources across disparate locations. The rest is history. The Internet population is reported to be nearing the 2-billion mark now!

While this modern Lord Krishna was sweeping the world off its feet with his magical charm, yours faithfully was blissfully ignorant of it until the late 90’s. I chanced upon it only by the close of the millennium but now the keyboard of my PC has become an integral part of my being like the Karna Kundalam! Many of you may have seen the classic comedy ‘Missiamma’ starring the inimitably romantic pair of Gemini Ganesan and Savithri. One of the main characters of the movie was the comedian Sarangapani who paraded the entire movie with a harmonium slung around his shoulders. I have my keyboard slung around my shoulders in a similar fashion. Well, almost!

It is awesome enough to realize that Internet has touched 2 billion human lives but how it keeps in its stranglehold at least half of them is truly amazing. Grandparents with their vacant maxillary and mandibular arches filled with dentures who probably spent all their youth waiting for postman can now be seen shooting off emails to their great grandchildren with consummate skill! They spend most of their time chatting on the internet! They keep sending slokas, mantras and other pseudo religious stuff with stunning visuals asking the recipients to forward them to others with an assurance that if they are sent to at least ten in 48 hours, they may have some great windfall coming to them!

I am a lot more fortunate than others. I get at least half a dozen mails daily announcing that I have won a million dollars in an Internet sweepstake. Before the news of this huge fortune can sink in, I hear from an Attorney from Nigeria telling me that there are some 56 million dollars lying unclaimed in a warehouse in Ivory Coast and if I could tell him my account number, he would have it transferred to me within 72 hours. Out of this, I could retain 15% towards my professional charges and the balance could be invested in any viable business on his behalf. I once wrote to one of them that a friend of mine owned a tea stall and wished to upgrade it to a five star hotel. The Nigerian replied that he had never heard of such a fantastic plan in his life and gave me the green signal to go ahead straightaway!

Internet does enliven my mornings with fabulous jokes about every conceivable subject or should I say, subjects that end in conception! I frantically delete them without a trace but they keep coming back at a furious rate! And then there are interesting offers that might interest someone like the Puranic king Yayati who was cursed to become an old man instantly by his father in law! As there were no internet offers those days for youthful rejuvenation, Yayati had to trade off his old age infirmities with the vigours of youth of his youngest son, Puru. People now need not worry at all as Internet keeps offering ways and means to keep our youth propped up eternally!

Is Internet a bane or a boon? This is a raging debate now! But what will I do without it?

Dear sri,
When I saw the name of the thread on my IGoogle Home Page I rushed to read, what such an inviting sentence was all about!
Not only youngsters, we, senior citizens are also discovering the joys of internet. Recently my younger sister got her internet connection & I gave her a SMS
Ini ulagam un kaiyil!!
When it comes to IL, I am one of the beneficiaries because of my cookery forum. I post a recipe at 5 PM, there is a FB from the Middle East by 7 & before I go to bed, a flattering FB from Atlanta. I cannot ask for any better reward for all my effort. When friends & relatives ask me, why I don’t publish a cookery book, this is the reason I give – the instant gratification is immense!
Yes, as you write, that we have won a lottery is a frequent email, besides, deity pictures being circulated to X no: of recepients bringing the best of luck.
Recently there was an article in the Business line supplement on
Laptop Chef!
So, in households of newly married youngsters, if there is the aroma of cooking wafting in the air, it could well be hot off the Internet – hopefully my forum!!
Love,
Chithra.
!

Sri,

I came in to find out who was the indispensable person in your life.

Quite true the internet, is something that has become so wired to our systems.

It has helped forge friendships, solemnizing marriages, getting your degrees, chatting, dating and what not.

Talking of the nigerian lotteries, I have to definitely tell you a incident that happened in the close circle.

one of my friend's husband got a mail (5 years back when this scam was very new) and they kept it hush, hush and had lots of discussion. one weekend, when we were invited, and talking after lunch, my friend told me that her dh has got this offer in nigeria, and the money is unbelievable, and
he need's to work for 15 days only every month. we went along with whatever she was saying, as i was worried if the husband would feel bad if i questioned too much. later when i got my 2 minutes, with my friend, i asked her the question that was nagging me..whether he attended any interview (atleast telephonic) she said no. does he know how he got the offer or if it was for something he applied. later in the evening my very reliable google search showed me the list of scams that i forwarded to her. such is the power of this internet that you do feel the world is now just a global village.

My son's class teacher tells him to check out for more details and bring it to school. the person who gets the best possible details is given a star. Today my Daughter can discuss her doubts in marks with a teacher sitting in some far off place without moving out of the house.

The service engineer who comes to my place says he instals atleast 5 systems in the houses of the 60+ who clearly ask for a system that helps them watch their grandchildren in us and talk to their son when they feel like.

I am really happy for these parents who just wait for the time when their kids come online to chat.

I would say without the internet, i would not be enjoying giving this fb here.

It is like a sharp edged knife, that can be used to save life or take life.

will stay away from the banes as boons look overweight today

Dear Chithra
I am aware that this time it is a drab subject that I have taken up. I,therefore, wanted to infuse some life into it at least through an exciting title that would make people curious. Glad to know you are the first victim and I am sorry too for disappointing you!

If you had wanted to greet me when I first got my PC, you would have said "Ulagam un viralil!" because I type with one finger! My other 9 fingers are totally indifferent to Internet activities.

Talking of all the FBs you get from across the globe for your recipes, I am reminded of what once the veteran recipe writer Meenakshi Ammal said of one of her students. She was surprised that her students could always get better results from her recipes than she herself could! The way things are developing, I won't be surprised if Sony comes out with a two-in-one, A laptop and an electric stove!
Sri

Dear Shanthi
"It has helped forge friendships, solemnizing marriages, getting your degrees, chatting, dating and what not."

That was a nice summing up of the Internet. The problem is that the cyberspace is like the "Paarkadal" (Ocean of Milk) on which Vishnu sojourns. If you churn it , you'll get both lethal poison like the 'Aalakala visham' and the nectar of immortality. With proper use of internet, one can become a scholar, a scientist or a great leader. Internet can also lead one to total ruin through self destruction. It all depends on what we choose from it, the letal poison or the Amrit.

That scam you have quoted is typically Nigerian. I was surprised to see nearly a hundred thousand sites on Nigerian scams! Even after twenty years of people being taken for a royal ride by these scams, they continue to put faith in such mails. It can be attributed only to greed of wealth or a desperate need for money.

I fully agree with you that internet is an unparallelled resource for young students provided their use of internet is under parental guidance. Gone are the days like mine when we had to rely on printed commentaries and notes like Minerva and Konar guides!

Internet has indeed made the evening of people like us very enjoyable. I feel immensely happy that I am a father figure for most of the ILites that keep in touch with me!
Sri

Dear Sri,

Now this is what i call a classy blog, with Sri at his naughty best.

Well what would i do without it ? Well let me ask everyone out here one thing.

Suppose u had to choose between these two, absence of spouse for a few days, or absense of the internet, which one would u chose.This question for both the sexes.i would be very interested to know the answer.HAHA

Well for me, i will choose to have the internet over Harsha, bcs i am sued to her absence to visit her mother, and Satsangs, and in fact when she is not around, i get the chance to paint the pink city Red, so in fact i do fondly l;ook forward when she is away.

And i do tell her , harsha take yr time, and give her a big wad of notes, u see.HAHA

Sri, now u have got me into a naughty mood.

Loved this one, u brought Krishna, yashoda and god knows who in this blog.What did u drink before u wrote this one ? HAHA

Regards

kamal

Dear Cheeniya sir,

I rushed here to read about the person you cannot do without. I enjoyed the following lines very much!

That was a nice summing up of the Internet. The problem is that the cyberspace is like the "Paarkadal" (Ocean of Milk) on which Vishnu sojourns. If you churn it , you'll get both lethal poison like the 'Aalakala visham' and the nectar of immortality. With proper use of internet, one can become a scholar, a scientist or a great leader. Internet can also lead one to total ruin through self destruction. It all depends on what we choose from it, the lethal poison or the Amrit.

Internet is indeed a boon and we can't imagine our lives before its invention. All good things come with a few risk factors.

Just a couple of days ago, there was a video clip on CNN called Cheaters who Cheat. Apparently, some college students who are afraid of failing, outsource their essay paper HW for a fee to other countries, just as I suspected to India, Pakistan and Ukraine. As long as such cheating students exist, internet paper mills will thrive and American brains will fry!

Good news is that colleges and schools have become savvy enough to detect with software if the essay was written by the student or not.

I still remember not turning my head this way or that during exams, lest the supervisor might think either I copied or I let someone copy.
Too bad we didn't have all these easy tricks when we were students!

Sri,

Without the internet how will i enjoy clips like this and this./ my nephew who came home, showed me the link exclusively, do enjoy the reply of the great M.

What a title Sir!! I was too curious, so peeped in to look at.
Next time IL meet la ennakkum, Lalitha vukkum nalla topic nu nenaichen. Oh no!!
Jokes apart, Of course, internet is boon in many ways provided we put it to proper use.
Love,
Meenakshi

Dear Cheeniya,
Quite an interesting analysis of the internet which has become all pervasive.The webcam has added spice to the old to keep in touch with their grandchildren.Internet has become the single window for information,quotes and humour connected with any subject under the sun.My only grievance is that I get flooded with e mails and it requires time and patience to separate the grain from the chaff.
Regards
LAKSHIMINARAYANAN