Making a mountain out of a molehill!

If someone close to you is known for making a big issue of very trivial things, please do not despair but be happy that he is in the majority! A study conducted sometime ago by a voluntary organisation in a middle-class locality in Chennai has traced the root of big domestic fights to some very trivial issues in more than 95% of the cases studied. Smaller issues tend to become prestige issues causing irreconcilable stand-off between a husband and a wife and between mil and dil. Small differences of opinion or minor issues being repetitive in nature soon metamorphose into intense hatred and enmity. Statements like ‘if mil breaks, it is a mud pot but if the same is broken by the dil, it becomes a golden pot’ are all tell-tale signs of souring relationship.

Making mountain of a molehill is essentially a human characteristic that has been in existence from time immemorial. This phrase is sourced to an ancient Roman Poet, Horace of the First Century BC who first used the expression ‘Mountains will labour to give birth to a mouse!’ It will be interesting to note that even some of the revered sages of yore like Sage Durvasa excelled in this attribute. He was known for dishing out lethal curses even for very minor offences as in the case of Sakunthala. The poor girl did not notice the arrival of the sage, her mind having been solely occupied by her husband Dushyant at the material time. The Sage flew into a rage and cursed her that whoever was occupying her thoughts would completely forget her! The rest of the story is known to everyone.

When I first read Shakespeare’s Much Ado About Nothing, I expected it to be a breezy comedy as a novel of PG Wodehouse but it was not so. Maybe the Bard considered the suspected infidelity of a woman as a trivial issue from the point of view of British aristocracy and hence called his play so! Unlike the characters of his other plays, the repentant hero, Claudio in this play, makes full amends in the end justifying the classification of the play as a comedy. Then only I realised that the major difference between a Shakespearean tragedy and comedy was that there would be no fatalities in the latter!

People who watched the recent aberrations in the cricket matches played between India and Australia would need no better examples of making a mountain of a molehill. If Symonds bore a striking resemblance to our ancestors, it was no fault of his but if his hideous application of some skin cream to protect his face accentuated his apelike countenance, Harbhajan was not to blame either for pointing it out to him in sheer goodwill! How the sporting press revelled in making headlines out of this episode was sensational journalism at its best!

Remember Kushboo, the actress who had a temple built for her by her crazy fans? When she ceased to be the cheesecake that she used to be, people started paying attention to her utterances and when she once made some innocuous statement about woman’s virtue, all hell broke loose in Tamilnadu. Cases were filed simultaneously by her detractors in 23 courts! People even demanded her expatriation to another State! For a whole month, newspapers were full of this episode pushing out even news items relating to cruel molestation of women in Police Stations and other public places.

Some successful husbands are aware of the fact that major domestic upheavals are caused only by minor issues. They guard against this by some kind of portfolio allocations by which the wife takes all decisions only in respect of minor issues while the hubby confines himself to only major issues. What are the minor and major issues?

Smaller issues like which car we should buy, how much amount to save, when to visit home town, which Sofa, air conditioner, refrigerator to buy, monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc are left to be decided by the wife. The husband decides on very big issues like whether America should attack Iran, whether Britain should lift sanction over Zimbabwe, whether to widen African economy, whether Sachin Tendulkar should retire etc etc. With that kind of an understanding, need I say that peace reigns supreme in such households?

hello sri


long time no c
nnu sollavendaam
athaan sollivitteergale
making a mountain
out of molehill
enga side best nu...

Smaller issues like which car we should buy, how much amount to save, when to visit home town, which Sofa, air conditioner, refrigerator to buy, monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc are left to be decided by the wife. The husband decides on very big issues like whether America should attack Iran, whether Britain should lift sanction over Zimbabwe, whether to widen African economy, whether Sachin Tendulkar should retire etc etc. With that kind of an understanding, need I say that peace reigns supreme in such households?

amamam
romba paavam paaru
which refrigerator
to keep maid or not...
decide pannuvathu pengala?
coffee lernthu
raathiri tiffin varai
paavam ethu koduthaalum
sappidum typugal paaru...

molehillai mountain akkivittena?

sathya

Dear Cheeniyaji,

Your post reminds me of a famous joke told in every marriage : wife does the house work etc & Hubby looks after the more important jobs like Indo-China relationship, Tibet crisis etc.

I have observed that the people who make mountain out of Molehill are people who actually crave attention.They also cannot take defeat in life.

There is an Indian couple here who are related to me. I asked them about the secret success of their happy married life. The wife answered: Well he has been away working in the Oil fields of Northern Territory.He took care of that while I took care of the minor things (house, kids, finance etc)

OK, what happened when hubby came back? Oh very simple he now umpires for the local cricket club!!!!!!!!!!

There you go, no mole hill no mountain....

Regards,

Corallux

Dear Sri,
A very delightful post & I can make out that you have enjoyed writing it, very much !
The latter, rather ,last part is a domestic happening in every house - good to know that it is ditto in your house also !
In tamil we say
ஈறைப் பேன் ஆக்கி
பேனைப் பெருமாள் ஆக்கி
It is very very true, though we love to say with vanity, that we stick to facts & never exaggerate !!

Well, Sri, don't you agree that your thread title is the job of Naradar as well ?
I am not mentioning about anybody known to us, please !

I don't rule out my coming back here again !!
Love,
Chithra.

Dear Satya
Vacation mudinju nanbargalai
Paarppathupola magizchi
Ungal FB kandu!
Edhu koduthalum sappidavathu
Mattumillai. Edhuvume
Kodukkavittalum punsirippodu
Niruthum ragam naangal!
Netru kooda Dalai Lama patri
Naan sonnathu romba sari endru
En manaiviyidam certificate!
Sri

Dear Corralux
That's a very sensible solution to a monumental problem. The ego clash occurs only when both try to do the same thing as we saw in the famous movie 'Abhiman' .If the wife sings and hubby just listens, they'll be the Made for Each Other couple!

But seriously I agree with your view point that making a mountain of a molehill is the trade mark of people who crave attention. They nurse a constant fear that if they dont make their presence felt, they'll be totally ignored!
Sri

dear sri,
dalai lama issue parthal vegu naatgalaga try panna piragu vanda certificate pola, but yenna venna sollunga onga varga thollai illaiyel vazhvey virichodi vidugiradu, kalyanam panni irubathi nangu varudam yeppadi kazhithen yendru theriyada odi vittadu anal ippodu oru siru sandai poda kooda alillai, impress panna irundaal adoda sogamey thani what say u..sunkan

Dear Chithra
Hindus believe that Siva is matter and Parvathi is energy. All sensible couples remember this and respect their mutual positions! I can speak for husbands firmly. We just dont believe in poking our nose in trivial issues where the wife is better equipped to handle them. This dawned on me on the very first day after my marriage when my DW made some critical comments about the vegetables that I had brought from the market. I remember her comment clearly till date!

That building up of Eeru to the exalted status of Perumal is a classic example of a molehill being made a mountain! I am waiting to hear from our venerable ILites on this subject!
Sri

Originally Posted by sunkan

dear sri,
dalai lama issue parthal vegu naatgalaga try panna piragu vanda certificate pola, but yenna venna sollunga onga varga thollai illaiyel vazhvey virichodi vidugiradu, kalyanam panni irubathi nangu varudam yeppadi kazhithen yendru theriyada odi vittadu anal ippodu oru siru sandai poda kooda alillai, impress panna irundaal adoda sogamey thani what say u..sunkan

Dear Sundari
Pondatti oorukku poitta endru Janagaraj madiri thulli kuthikkum aangal, maru naale sorndu poi viduvargal! 'Sandai poda aalillatta thambhi chandaprasandan' ellam chumma solradu!
Kuzhalinidhu yaazhinidhu enbar tham manaivi
ooril illathavar!
You are absolutely right there, Sundari
Sri

Dearest Cheensaar,

Ennathai solla.......! Wanted to see what mountain is being made from which molehill. Also, wanted to enjoy myself with another of those word celebration created especially for us by our inimitable Cheeniya. And, no, I am not making any mountains when I say I was not disappointed on any account! Made a great reading!

Well, it once again gave me a lot of food to mull over...should I say, literature to mull over and have to run to the library later to arm myself with all those books and educate myself.

You took us from Chennai streets to ancient Rome. Horace, I must now read you! Then I go back again to Durvasa and Shakuntalam. As I am still fuming for my heroine, I go t Britain to be with Shakespear's Claudio and am wondering which one to opt for, his tragedies or comedies. I am then shaken up from my pleasant thoughts by the frightening looks of Symonds and had to agree with all that Harbhajan said! It was with some consolation that Kushboo came to my rescue, any day a pleasanter sight indeed, only if she did not remind me of all the womens' troubles and their plight!!

Well well Cheensaar, where else can I get such a journey at the click of a button!

And must mention........the last para simply took the cake:) Yes sir...You keep deciding all the important matters...I have to go attend to the nitty grittys here like which dinner service I should buy to adorn my table for my guests in April! While at it...do try to do something about the petrol prices please.........

L, Kamla