Making a mountain out of a molehill!

Cheeniya Sir,

You are the one who is making a mountain out of a molehill--pinna 'onnum illaadha uppu chappu vishayathukku' ivvalavu build-up aa..

But what I accept from your statements is 'we are well-equipped' in those areas who had mentioned 'attended' by us, we are also well-equipped in the matters where men are 'well-equipped'. There is a proof in your reply ---that your DW accepted your idea on Dalai Lama subject.
But you guys don't want to give that position in the field of politics or what soever, outside the house matters.

Usually very minor issues creates problems than the major issues concerned. It will be like a 'busvanaam; at the end...
Yesterday, in our house we had a little 'heated discussion'-- my mil usually asks the same question to everybody in the house at all times and gives us an excuse that she forgot ( due to her old age). my eldest daughter got angry and was murmuring and I asked her to keep quiet, (by holding her arm tightly)and leave the place, for which she refused. Then the subject turned to me and she started yelling at me for grabbing her arm and so on...but all ended peacefully with the intervention of my hubby and my mom.
I think this is a perfect eg. for this head post..right?????

sriniketan

Dear Cheeniya Sir,

In the US there are shows on TV which are called Court Shows. They have a judge who presides over a real judicial dispute. One such is called Divorce Court and everyday a new case is shown. In one such show, a man wanted to divorce his wife because she always kept the doors of the kitchen's cupboard's open and it hit his head everytime he went into the kitchen. He said he had told her repeatedly to keep them closed and she kept them open always. Their divorce was granted.

In India, a friend of a friend went in for a divorce for several reasons - one being that she could never cook what she wanted and had to always cook something that her husband wanted.

[quote=cheeniya;261038] Statements like ‘if mil breaks, it is a mud pot but if the same is broken by the dil, it becomes a golden pot’ are all tell-tale signs of souring relationship.

[quote]

While these look trivial to an outsider, it surely is a monstrous issue for the couple. Probably because of the reason that you quoted. When one does not like a person, everything that they do will be disliked. But when one likes a person, then they will enjoy even the silliest things that the other does.

In my own home, when I have a fight with my husband, I begin to quote some thing that happened in the distant past - "Your brother said that ....." or "Your sister did that stupid thing.....". At which my husband will tell me about what my brother did to get even. When calm is restored, both of us will look back and laugh it off, probably because there are somethings that we do like in each other that overshadows all the other smaller things.

My MIL was from Thanjavur and she used to hate her in-laws who were from Kerala. Although all her in-laws were dead and gone, there never was a day when she did not curse them. My ancestory is also from Kerala and many a time I would think - Is she cursing me?? If I were to take this to heart, then I would begin to dislike all Thanjavur people and were I to have a son, then I would be abusing Thanjaur people to my DIL and this would continue like a relay race where one passes on a baton of dislike over a small thing to another generation. Sometimes I think this is the way clan wars and territorial battles begin - all over some mole-hill issues.

Dear Sri
You are definetly in a league by yourself! When it comes to the topics selection and writing of it as well. Now dont go say I am making mountain out of molehill because here i am not..I may have called mountain as mountain..I was not aware that the root of big domestic fights were traced to some very trivial issues in more than 95% of the cases studied..maybe my family was observed without our knowledge but we certainly fall into that category.. If we were to fight the matter would always be trivial. I am always amazed at how we agree with all the big and important matters.(example of important matter being : How many pots and pans need to be bought for cooking Oats and kollu !).
It is my opinion that women are more adept than men in making mountains out of molehills.. They always manage to blow things out of proportion that by the time it reaches their husband's ears the problem will sound like a mountain. My great grand father used to say Its enough to educate girls upto high school level but they need lots of handson experience to run a household. Here is probably where your portfolio allocation comes into use. I am glad u used the prefix before the word husband to describe the one who is aware of the fact that major domestic upheavals are caused only by minor issues. In fact my husband is so much smarter that he makes me think I am the one responsible for how much money to save and which car to buy when infact he smoothly gets it done while I am still mulling over it!? And ofcourse he also decides who should win the political elections and which player should retire among other trivial things..But since I am not one to make mountain out of such molehill matters peace does reign!

Dear Sri,
Let me give you another example of your title. Some men whose hair is in single digit number spend a long time in front of the mirror, combing fondly the scanty remains ! I think even the no: of “teeth of the comb” will be more than the hair! Please note, I am not referring to anybody here ! I repeat it !! There cannot be a more "valid" example for a mountain & a molehill!

Yet another development in recent years is the following. We go to a doctor for an ordinary head ache or a back pain. We are immediately referred to a specialist with a “pompous” appointment. From there we march to a Pathological laboratory for blood tests, an X ray clinic, not to forget the scanning centre, very often a CT scan as well ! By the time, the original pain is much better, but money having gone down the drain, creates new tension-pains ! We end up wondering why we did not allow nature to do the healing in its own sweet time, but made the ache-molehill so big!
Maladies of medical advancement !!
Love,
Chithra.

Dear Chithra
Thats really a good example of making mountain out of molehill:)

Originally Posted by Chitvish

Dear Sri,
Let me give you another example of your title. Some men whose hair is in single digit number spend a long time in front of the mirror, combing fondly the scanty remains ! I think even the no: of “teeth of the comb” will be more than the hair! Please note, I am not referring to anybody here ! I repeat it !! There cannot be a more "valid" example for a mountain & a molehill!
Love,
Chithra.

Chithmam,

I was just laughing as charu came, she asked me the reason, i read this out, and she burst out laughing..so a laughing good morning for her....

Sri,

Horace would really turn in his grave for using this simile.when he used it to comment about the results......

Just say your making a mountain out of a molehill during a argument be it a wife/husband/parents/inlaws.. and you had it...because what looks molehill, is again moutain for the other person.. so you can make mountains out of the very same sentence.

Coming, to the statement, I wish you did not write this now..and also that the fairer sex's adept ness about it...because now I know veda is going to say see sri has also said.. and the argument will continue from the airport .....Big LaughBig Laugh

A pimple before a date for a teenager looks a big mountain, while the mother thinks the daughter is making a molehill.

A wife grumbling about her putting on weight looks a small molehill to the husband who is watching tv ...

A mother grumbling about her child not eating well, when the child has already had its quota of junk food..and on top feeding it regular mealsRant I see this happening everyday.

When a granny gives a GD lecture for coming late, starting at coming late, and ending at questioning the capacity of the mother's parenting is a sure example..

A ordinary leg pain, will become a mountain to a self proclaimed hypochondriac...

Today everybody craves for attention, (i sometimes feel sympathy??) that they tend to exaggerate and relay and relate things...

I have a friend who is very well off, you only have to ask her how is she...she will start at oh! i am ok..believe me you are better of not asking her anything...it will start at her husband's health and then end up with the children's mischief.

Today's parents don't have the patience to tackle kid's mischief (me included), that we end up exaggerating the simple pranks of the children .

Sometimes, we make a elephant out of a ant....And look at my fb, looks i justified moutains out of a molehill...

Dear Sri,
I fully go with Nivedi's statement

In my own home, when I have a fight with my husband, I begin to quote some thing that happened in the distant past -
"My MIL was from Thanjavur and she used to hate her in-laws who were from Kerala. Although all her in-laws were dead and gone, there never was a day when she did not curse them.
. Sometimes I think this is the way clan wars and territorial battles begin - all over some mole-hill issues.

I have the same issue. I come from "kizakkethu stock" - that is how Palghat people refer to us & Vish is from Pgt. So, in the initial days of my married life, my MIL would always start off
"these kizaethukara are lazy to grate & grind coconut & cook tasty foods"
"They just add arisi mavu for thickening & decorate with cashews for "jambam" "
If only I had .........
Vish should be sitting on mountain top now !!

Well, Sri, with all your soft corner for Vish, I know you will rush to defend him NOW & HERE !

Love,
Chithra.

Dear Sri
The comments from Chitvish and Shanthi makes me wonder who is now making mountain out of a molehill??? really interesting to read everyones fb's :)

Originally Posted by Kamla

Dearest Cheensaar,

Ennathai solla.......! Wanted to see what mountain is being made from which molehill. Also, wanted to enjoy myself with another of those word celebration created especially for us by our inimitable Cheeniya. And, no, I am not making any mountains when I say I was not disappointed on any account! Made a great reading!

Well, it once again gave me a lot of food to mull over...should I say, literature to mull over and have to run to the library later to arm myself with all those books and educate myself.

You took us from Chennai streets to ancient Rome. Horace, I must now read you! Then I go back again to Durvasa and Shakuntalam. As I am still fuming for my heroine, I go t Britain to be with Shakespear's Claudio and am wondering which one to opt for, his tragedies or comedies. I am then shaken up from my pleasant thoughts by the frightening looks of Symonds and had to agree with all that Harbhajan said! It was with some consolation that Kushboo came to my rescue, any day a pleasanter sight indeed, only if she did not remind me of all the womens' troubles and their plight!!

Well well Cheensaar, where else can I get such a journey at the click of a button!

And must mention........the last para simply took the cake:) Yes sir...You keep deciding all the important matters...I have to go attend to the nitty grittys here like which dinner service I should buy to adorn my table for my guests in April! While at it...do try to do something about the petrol prices please.........

L, Kamla

Dear Kamla
We are almost becoming like Johnson and Boswell! Everyone knows how Boswell pampered Johnson and the noted historian Thomas Macaulay called Boswell's
adoration of Dr. Johnson "Lues Boswelliana, or disease of admiration."! And Boswell was justified about spoiling Johnson with all his admiration as he was able to get the best out of Johnson this way. But I really do not know if you are going to be as successful as Boswell as I may be soon running out of my steam!

It is not unusual in the world of English literature that the synopsis comes out far superior to the original stuff and your para about this thread of mine was absolutely delightful. If ever I decide to write a book, take it for granted that you will be my synopsis writer. Period!

I assure you that the question of the petrol price is already engaging my active attention and I have decided to tackle it asap by writing a letter to the Editor, The Hindu!

Till we meet again, happy hunting with the clicking of the button!
Sri