An affair to remember!

An affair to remember!

As we grow older, we’ll all have one thing for sure. No no. Not cataract or arthritis. I am not here to give you some tips on how to be healthy as we get older. I have come to talk to you about the memories of childhood and youth. Everyone beyond forty or thereabout is bound to have some memories of childhood and youth. Some of them are very pleasant and some may be painful but with the efflux of time, a strange thing happens. Sweet memories get sweeter but painful memories become less painful. They do not hurt us as much as they did a decade back. Maybe in films, people wait for three generations to avenge a wrong done to their great grandparents but in reality, it does not happen that way. We just forget it and get going. Seneca sums it up neatly thus: “Things that were hard to bear are sweet to remember!” Our mind has the great capacity of making an amalgam of all memories over a period of time in such a manner that all memories, sweet and painful, just leave a smile on the face. The longer the efflux of time, the stronger will be the smile!

There is a beautiful dialogue in the classic old movie, ‘An affair to remember’, that I can never forget. It is ‘Winter must be cold for those with no warm memories’. It is a very profound statement. Warm memories keep our hearts from freezing. Warmer memories keep our hearts glowing. It is a glowing heart that gives a twinkle to the eyes till our dying day.

Having extolled the virtues and benefits of memory, I must also mention to you about some of its practical problems. Everyone knows that memories keep the incidents and people involved insulated against aging. When we think of a dear classmate who we may not have seen for decades since we left the college, the picture that comes to our mind is how she or he may have appeared at the material time. If the passing years leave that person battered beyond recognition, the memories take a rude beating when we encounter that person now. There is no such problem with our childhood buddies that we keep in touch with regularly but strangely the memories tend to linger more on persons who have virtually gone out of our lives and there is no prospect of meeting them again.

Let me tell you a small episode from my life. I have a childhood friend by name Kumar. We were so close that my other friends usually referred to him as my alter ego! When we were in Presidency College he fell in love, as was customary in our days, with a junior student by name Abhirami. Soon this affaire d`amor became famous throughout the college. Initially the girl was very reticent but Kumar won her over completely with the help of a squirrel! This benevolent squirrel fell into the water closet in the Ladies’ Toilet one day and was desperately trying to keep its head above the water when Abhirami noticed it. Her loud shriek brought the entire college on its feet but no one had any idea about how to save the hapless creature. It was then our Kumar came rushing to the spot and without any hesitation put his hand into the closet and took the half dead squirrel into the warmth and comfort of his large palm. The fully soaked creature was gasping and trembling. Kumar rubbed its back tenderly like Lord Rama and fed it with some warm milk. Abhirami stood there transfixed with tears flowing down her ample cheeks. It was precisely at that moment, love swept Abhirami off her feet.

The affair lasted nearly three years and they were the role model for all aspiring Romeos and Juliets. Like all good love affairs, this one also did not end in marriage and when the break occurred, Kumar cried for three full days like a baby which was suddenly deprived of its favourite doll! The whole college had misty eyes for those three days as some kind of Requiem for their dead love. The days passed and we all got busy with our lives. I joined the Bank and he joined same organisation to eke out our living. We kept meeting each other in the club till a year back on a regular basis when Kumar used to moon over his old flame with some typical gibberish. It was then it happened. We were at a family function of an old friend when he took us to a shriveled old lady who looked like the twin of Mother Teresa and announced dramatically, “Know who this is? Abhirami!” Even now I find it difficult to describe the incredulous look on Kumar’s face on hearing these words! Right from that day, there is no more reminiscing of his affair with Abhirami!

“I'm always fascinated by the way memory diffuses fact.” said Diane Sawyer. I am no less fascinated by the way fact diffuses memory!

 

Dear Mole
You are displaying all the signs of an indulgent daughter! You are always full of praise and that increases the fear of my limitation. Will I have enough material to draw such liberal praise always? Hope I will!
You are right. There is something much better than getting what you want and that is not getting it! How true it is! Dont we spend more time brooding over what we do not get while we forget instantly what we get? I totally agree with you that the nouveau riche can be very disgusting but can make an excellent subject matter for case studies. I always look at such human aberrations with a lot of interest!
Yes. We may never know in what form Cupid makes his appearance. This time it was a squirrel in the closet! And he never fails to hit his target, the only instance of his landing himself in deep soup was when he tried to fool around Siva and Parvathi!
Thanks again Mole for your very warm appreciation!
Sri

 

Dear Mitra
When someone tells me that what I write holds her undivided attention, I rank it as the best compliment ever and I feel very nice about it. Thank you for joining me here, Mitra
Sri