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Thanks for stopping by!
Why compare?
Posted 15th May 2008 at 05:31 PM by Ranganayaki
Updated 15th May 2008 at 05:33 PM by Ranganayaki (FONT)
Updated 15th May 2008 at 05:33 PM by Ranganayaki (FONT)
I can’t seem to figure out what is the fun of comparing among peers? At least, I have had no fun being compared to my sibling, cousins or friends. Are we trying to forget that each one of us are different and had/having varied experiences?
I believe comparison kills, hence it completely sucks! I know we meet in groups for schooling and higher education, but each one of us have different backgrounds, desires, values in life. Sometimes it’s also luck factors, where at times you are extremely lucky and other times not so lucky.
Somehow I feel we are reduced to products, well that’s okay when it comes to job market, but not within families or friends. Why does that personal touch have to die? Have we become so narrow minded to compete among friends/family? Do we need “standards” there as well?
I really like it when I see varied people around me. It never occurred to me that their degrees/jobs/status would even have to affect me. Instead I value their thoughts and the idea is to be there for each other, no matter what. Love is what matters the most and I get to be myself.
Yet, I am being compared, why?
Are we losing sync with the essence of friendship and family?
I believe comparison kills, hence it completely sucks! I know we meet in groups for schooling and higher education, but each one of us have different backgrounds, desires, values in life. Sometimes it’s also luck factors, where at times you are extremely lucky and other times not so lucky.
Somehow I feel we are reduced to products, well that’s okay when it comes to job market, but not within families or friends. Why does that personal touch have to die? Have we become so narrow minded to compete among friends/family? Do we need “standards” there as well?
I really like it when I see varied people around me. It never occurred to me that their degrees/jobs/status would even have to affect me. Instead I value their thoughts and the idea is to be there for each other, no matter what. Love is what matters the most and I get to be myself.
Yet, I am being compared, why?
Are we losing sync with the essence of friendship and family?
Total Comments 8
Comments
 |  when being compared it is best to put forward your thought that you do not appreciate it, i know negatives have a way of making more waves as people never change but then it is better to avoid being stifled rather than get worked up, none need other's opinion anyday..sunkan |
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| |  That hurt as well as fueled me. it's a negative energy to be gotten rid of at some point or other. The previous generation used to work that way, especially people who were in India, thought tht was the best way to bring the best out for their children, which was wrong obviously. Taare Zameen par ? Remember ? |
| Updated 16th May 2008 at 11:02 AM by MeenLoch |
| |  dear Sunkan ma'am, I understand I need to get beyond the comments I receive. But I find it really hard when it comes within family. It takes me time, but I do get over it,the bruise remains though...Perhaps I am in the "sensitive" category. RN |
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| | dear ML, thank you so much for your understanding! Yea, Taare Zameen par is a great example! hugs RN |
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| |  Dear Ranganayaki, a beautiful, "eternally common" topic for blogging!! Comparing does, in most cases, affect one's morale.One who does it, may do it with a good intention for the betterment of the person, but very often at the cost of hurting the one at the receiving end. I was at the receiving end of being compared with my fair, beautiful younger sister in my young age, for my average looks. So, I know what it is to be "unfavourably" compared. We should restrict our comparison to "inanimate" things! Love, Chithra. |
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| | Dear Chithra Ma'am, You are right, mostly done to push the individual at the cost of hurting him/her. I am hoping with time, this sort of comparison vanishes! Ranganayaki |
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| |  I agree totally. In our country, many parents always think by comparing our child with more brilliant or talented child will make our child more hardworking. (Many husbands also compare wife with other ladies like this.) Actually their intention may not be to hurt, but it is not the result. The child becomes more worse only and gets angry with parents and also low self-esteem. And worse thing is he will also learn to compare, and he will compare his own parents with other parents and TV advertisement parents ! Like tit for tat ! It is not healthy at all. |
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| | Dear Swarnalata, I can't say it better, how unhealthy such comparison is turning out to be.Thankyou for stopping by! Ranganayaki |
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