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Retired and happy - A story

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Posted 4th April 2008 at 12:35 PM by MeenLoch

It was the summer of 2030. The couple were staying in a small apartment they had purchased back in their working days. Radha was 72 now and her husband Sri was 81. They had seen it all in their lifetime, births and deaths, marriage and festivals, new persons in their family and their lovely grand kids.

They have a daughter and a younger son, both employed and well settled with their family and kids and way busy with their lives. The new members, their son-in-law and daughter-in-law in their family were lovely, caring and cooperative.

Every weekend the daughter called and enquired about their well being. What more can they expect from a woman who already has her own family and friends, her own set of problems and her career ? It's her turn to live.

They had accepted the new generation and the concepts of westernization well. Although they chose to live with their own old lifestyles, they embraced the new world well. They had stopped forcing their ideas and values long back. Sometimes they were heard and most of the times even their conventional or wise thoughts were ignored by their own loved ones. So they lived in peace with this truth.

Their son was very successful in his field. He had settled in US and made trips all over the world often.

Isn't this something they had always dreamed of - A settled life for both their kids ? Everything they struggled for all their life was accomplished and it was time to turn inwards. Their little banterings were still present as a testimony to their 40 year old marriage. They had also been to US a couple of times, but what can beat the morning filter coffee, the temples and the soil which they were born in ? They preferred to stay in India, even if it meant taking care of themselves on their own. They did have servants to clean, cook and do daily chores. So there was little effort involved. This scene, was opposite to their 30s and 40s when they did not have enough time to do it all. They were running and chasing and extremely busy all the times. Radha was married into a huge family. She was always occupied with daily chores, necessary shopping and she would even repair electronic stuffs around home. She had crossed two caesarian with her children's birth followed by her hernia operations. She was active and living it all anyways. She was looked upon by her own relatives.

As for Sri, he was always running behind time, to office, for his children's admissions, for his siblings and for everything. He had resolved that he would volunteer for social cause even before he retired and that kept him busy now for half the day. He also organized religious gatherings and during evenings he helped his wife, something he had never done before. As for Radha, she was still the lovely understanding mother her kids could come and talk to, but this time there was a difference. It was over phone, less frequent and obviously the issues they talked did not have any childlike innocence.

Radha and Sri have a past together with a family, children and perhaps a roller coaster ride so far. Time had run very fast, but years had bonded them so well that they cared for each other as they would care for themselves. The memories of the four as a family crossed both their minds often. They wished if they could move back the arms of the clock and re-live the entire experience, with the pillow fights the four had, the outings they had together, the fights both Radha ans Sri would have on buying them stuff and then making up, the limited income middle class but a happy family. Strangely the resources "time and money "were all there, but the niche they had carved for themselves wasn't. Now it was all behind them. The children had to leave the nest and build one for themselves, as the conventions in the world would have it.

They just had to confront the fact that it was just two of them in the end, till death parted them. Also this was something that they never thought their life would eventually be like - With little needs, with a matured thinking and with love for fellow beings and god.
Posted in Hum Tum
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    vijikrishnan's Avatar
    Dear Meenaloch
    You have narrated the thing what is happening in my life. I felt as if i am looking my own life.
    Viji
    permalink
    Posted 6th April 2008 at 07:16 AM by vijikrishnan vijikrishnan is offline
  2. Old Comment
    MeenLoch's Avatar
    AC ,
    Thnx for the encouragement. I think it will be a pleasurable experience reading what you like, not thinking about future or past, stress-free and peaceful, provided we accept it completely.

    Chithu Mam,
    Thnx for gracing the comments area with your presence. 20 Yrs is a long time. I read in Shobha De's book called 'Spouse', that these days mom-in-laws are so happening that they have so many things to do other than interfering in DIL or son's life. You are quite happening

    Have always liked this concept of "detached attachment". I feel it actually builds a stronger relationship with lot of respect and love, on a long run. "Samsaram Minsaram" movie has Lakshmi moving out. Remember ?

    It requires maturity not to expect at all and it's blissful to be matured. Way to go Chithu mam.
    permalink
    Posted 6th April 2008 at 05:40 PM by MeenLoch MeenLoch is offline
  3. Old Comment
    MeenLoch's Avatar
    Pushpa mam,
    You are extremely right. Not everyone can take this change in life so happily. It takes years and mental maturity. Mind always expects reciprocation for all that you did for children in past, so can we blame the couple here ?
    Occupying oneself helps.
    Thanks for commenting here
    permalink
    Posted 6th April 2008 at 05:45 PM by MeenLoch MeenLoch is offline
    Updated 7th April 2008 at 08:42 AM by MeenLoch
  4. Old Comment
    MeenLoch's Avatar
    Oviya,
    I am in same situaton as you, very thankful for a fabulous life they gave me. The reason I wrote this was to think from their shoes. From our side we should make them feel more valued, as every son or daughter would say..Thnx for commenting dear

    Parvat,
    Thnx for the complements and comments here. I just had to be them for a while. I like your username - Parvat

    Vijikrishnan,
    This post to some extent summarizes what my parents do, although they are not that old yet. I think it s time to see inwards for people whose children have left the nests. I want all such parents and old couples to get selfish for the first time probably and just think of themselves and follow all dreams they couldn't pursue so far. People even take up new courses and degrees.
    Thnx for visitng by, dear VK mam
    permalink
    Posted 7th April 2008 at 08:42 AM by MeenLoch MeenLoch is offline
  5. Old Comment
    Paulina's Avatar
    Dear Meenloch,
    How beautifully you have portrayed the retired life of senior citizens.It seemed as if you had videographed the whole scene!!
    Such a young person like you has been able to depict the whole gamut of feelings and thoughts of an elderly couple so well.
    As an elderly couple, we could relate perfectly with the empty nest syndrome and take consolation in the fact that there are scores like us all over the world.We tell each other we have come full circle ....we began with just the two of us didn't we?!!
    Cultivating hobbies and having a few close friends among your own age group is the only answer for this part of one's life.
    Great reading , enjoyed it.Treat us to more such.All the best.
    PAULINA
    permalink
    Posted 11th April 2008 at 12:15 PM by Paulina Paulina is offline
 

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