The Pervert Touch
Posted 15th December 2008 at 12:36 PM by malspie
Friends,
Today I will blog on a very important chapter of a female child! This blog hopefully should open the cobwebs of many minds and start shooting the lessons which I learnt at a tender age! Do read further for a complete insight on the captioned subject.
I was growing up fast from a baby girl to a woman. Like every mother, she was anxious, as I was in 3rd Standard and had started showing signs of growing in to a woman. Amma’s worry was not my concern nor was I eager to know about the biological changes taking place in my body. I was dragged to our family physician. My mother poured her concern to the doc. He examined me and it was a bit awkward. My cute lemon yellow frock was to be lifted and I had to! My Ammai had her eyebrows knotted and I am still wondering why this examination. I have no fever, no vomiting, no cold, no cough, Amma is worrying for nothing! The girl in me is still alive though she is going to vanish in few days or years, I am too young to decide.
Doc after his examination spoke to my mom, later I was not under any medication. I saw my mom have long quiet conversations with my Appa. My Appa’s attitude towards me had not changed; I was still jumping and clapping my hands, though my ammai’s worry was a concern! Why is she so worried about me? I have scored 93% marks, done well in my unit tests, then why this worry, I have no bad remarks in School Calendar, I was perplexed.
Ammai decided to have a chat with me. She asked me to sit and listen to all that she says attentively and patiently. I wondered where I was wrong, but still gave it a shot!
The first thing Ammai thought me was “Pervert Touch”. I was given an explanation of why boys are boys and girls are girls. She pointed out to the small biological change on my body and told me that I will grow up to be like her. I will be wearing a sari soon and will also get to use her make-up kit! I was thrilled, how much I loved to use her make-up kit, those lipsticks! My heart pounded. May be she was adding the flavors to make things lighter for me. She again came back to the “Pervert Touch”. Now, no hugging maternal or paternal uncles for that matter Appas and Ammas friends too, who are called as Uncles! Even if they do, I have to keep a check on their palm and the finger movements and immediately tell Ammai, if anyone tries to reach my new found biological growth in my body! If I disobey her, I will not be a good girl in the books of God and he will have a very strong punishment lined up for me! “Ammai stronger than the punishment, you line up”, I asked her. “Yes”, she shot back. That could be worse than a Napoleon treatment, I sealed my straying thoughts.
I was in 3rd standard and she could not explain to me much at that tender age, her few sentences of asserting alertness did help me a lot. I had some of my Appa’s friends holding me a bit tight etc.. I would scream for my Ammai and tell her, “Uncle is giving me that ‘Pervert Touch’. Today, I feel how embarrassed that man would have been. Yes, when a girl grows up much earlier, she has to face the wrath of the popping eyes of few men around. I was growing faster than a sprout and I salute my Ammai for giving me those teachings. She was not bred in a MetroCity but knew how to tutor her kids. I would pass on all these messages to my friends when they were in 6th standard, yes; they were a bit late compared to me. “My mummy does not speak anything like that”, they would say.
I was busy protecting my friends from ‘Pervert Touch’ and harsh punishment of the Lord!
Ammai you were so advanced, I salute you!
I am happy to have learnt what those ‘Pervert Touch’ meant! If you have still not given your kid a lesson of it, make sure you do! My mom did!
(Ammai means Mother
Appa means Father)
Total Comments 45
Comments
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Lovely write-up Mals, and a title to match!
True, not all have been told or taught about 'The Pervert Touch'! And it seems to be a taboo topic in some homes, even now!
It was agonizing to give my now 13 yr. old son, this talk when he was just 8 years old! But I did, coz the 'Pervert Touch' makes no gender difference these days!
And YES, to all mothers out there...who have not given the talk so far....DO IT!
Mals...Hats off yet again....for bringing up this topic!Posted 15th December 2008 at 12:47 PM by ANK
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Mals A wonderful blog from you on probably the most important talk to our girls from mothers. It is sad that society is filled with people who have no inhibitions giving the pervert touch and pervert look to girls and later on to women.
Nowadays girls not only mature faster they want satisfaction even faster. Its becoming a challenge for mothers of sons to teach them to escape the cluthes of girls when in school. Seriously. Is there any better example of a scoiety that is morally detiorarated?
I know my Mals would only blog on topics that are worthy of it. You rock my friend:)Posted 15th December 2008 at 01:41 PM by Anandchitra -
Hi Malu dear,
I really find your write ups an eye-opener for all of us.
You have summed up so important thing, yet so nicely, great yaar. I still remember when i was a kid and Mom talking to me about these things.....yeah, I was a little too grown up as compared to girls of my age, so my mom told me all such things which at that time I heard with round big eyes.......surprised and thinking....is it my Mom?????? but that has helped me a lot to know/avoid getting into trouble and recognising the look/touch/comments of perverts......and that saved me from so many so called relatives (sex-predator)....
But time to time, my Mom gave me doses of this growing up things.......till i was into my Masters......and yet she is still there for me to help me in many trivial things......
Thanks for getting us back to our girlie lessons..........Posted 15th December 2008 at 03:49 PM by Meeta - dear mals,
this is one thing girls should understand.
sometimes i find that even in temples some old men come and just lean over the women.they dont even leave places of worship.
regards
paviPosted 15th December 2008 at 05:12 PM by pavithrasriram -
Hi Mals!
Thanks for such a wonderful blog.. Infact this was one topic which was going in my mind for quite a few days. My daughter is right now in her 3rd std. and she is also a quite chubby girl . She is tall and reasonably well built for her age. But she is not very fat and all. Even I was wondering how to start this topic with her. I told her last week what was bad touch and good touch. She asked me showing examples and i explained to her. But I was thinking whether this is too early and I am unnecessarily scaring her . On reading your blog I understand it is Just the right age. Thanks..
Subha.Posted 15th December 2008 at 11:59 PM by subhav
