Do you celebrate your friend’s success?
Do you celebrate your friend’s success?
We wish our friends well.
BUT wait a minute! Do we, really?
Well…………..Not THAT well!
I know, you are going to be incensed hearing me say this. But let us accept, we are human, after all. We want our friends to succeed, but when they do and outshine us, the fear does show up!
Let us be honest to ourselves – when we feel down, we tolerate easily hearing about a friend’s misfortune than his success! The identification factor gives us comfort in mind. If our friend is very much like us, we feel comfortable. Rest assured that it is natural for everybody to feel this way. Nothing alienates people like success. This is an unwritten law of life.
It is not without the reason that people who reach the top say ‘It is lonely at the top’. Eagles fly alone at the heights they are used to.
Allow your friends to celebrate their success without yourself feeling intimidated and join them happily. Also learn to sympathize with their failures without feeling a secret satisfaction about them. Your friends must have the confidence in you that if they share their success stories with you, you will feel no pang of jealousy, envy or hatred in you. Learn to say “you do deserve this success and none, more”! You are likely to be right. You will certainly be a friend.
Let us learn to accept these words:
I am happy for my friend’s happiness. Sharing their happiness is my happiness.
Love,
Chithra.
We wish our friends well.
BUT wait a minute! Do we, really?
Well…………..Not THAT well!
I know, you are going to be incensed hearing me say this. But let us accept, we are human, after all. We want our friends to succeed, but when they do and outshine us, the fear does show up!
Let us be honest to ourselves – when we feel down, we tolerate easily hearing about a friend’s misfortune than his success! The identification factor gives us comfort in mind. If our friend is very much like us, we feel comfortable. Rest assured that it is natural for everybody to feel this way. Nothing alienates people like success. This is an unwritten law of life.
It is not without the reason that people who reach the top say ‘It is lonely at the top’. Eagles fly alone at the heights they are used to.
Allow your friends to celebrate their success without yourself feeling intimidated and join them happily. Also learn to sympathize with their failures without feeling a secret satisfaction about them. Your friends must have the confidence in you that if they share their success stories with you, you will feel no pang of jealousy, envy or hatred in you. Learn to say “you do deserve this success and none, more”! You are likely to be right. You will certainly be a friend.
Let us learn to accept these words:
I am happy for my friend’s happiness. Sharing their happiness is my happiness.
Love,
Chithra.
Total Comments 46
Comments
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Dear Mami,
I think iam the first to comment on your blog .....he he he
Mami what you say cent percent right..we do not have the guts to admit the same. Though we feel sad at a friend's failure but always there is contentment that she could not cross beyond us. Though we wish them all success but inside we know that they should not grow any point beyond us.
This is quite a subtle feeling but cleverly camouflaged and we go on tell our minds too that we are quite happy at their success but a little introspection will clearly bring out this default in us.
Atleast let us hope that we subconsioucly too wish our friends all success and take pride in the same..
A great blog mami asusual to start with the week.Posted 25th October 2009 at 11:02 PM by Lalitha Shivaguru
Updated 25th October 2009 at 11:04 PM by Lalitha Shivaguru -
Dear Lali, more than for the first........
FB, I thank you for analysing it in more detail.
Yes, this is basic human nature, but it needs guts to accept it! You have done just that!Love,
Chithra.Posted 26th October 2009 at 12:35 AM by Chitvish -
Dear Chithra,
Its a beautiful way to start this week by reading your fantastic blog.
Great words well said Chithra!
Love
ManjuPosted 26th October 2009 at 01:50 AM by manjunat - Manju, sometimes, when we.....
analyse, in the heart of hearts (as we say), we realise that these feelings are true though we shy away from accepting them~!!
Love,
Chithra.Posted 26th October 2009 at 02:39 AM by Chitvish -
Dear Supermom
You have rightly said there are many who feel jealous of others success.
I love to celebrate my very close friends success and have done so quite a few times.
But if she/he is not so close to me i do not care much in this matter. It is not jealous, I have no much feeling about it to celebrate.
I have noted a few when someone is reaching a particular goal from another you will find lots of negetative feedback to that person, like it is no use doing this you will not gain anything which is not good.
I feel when someone whats to really do something we friends should encourage them to do so and when she succeed in that willingly we should join in the celebration without any bad feeling.
.Posted 26th October 2009 at 02:43 AM by Arunarc
