Idhu Andha Kaalam

The art of seeing a girl by a prospective groom and his family had developed into a highly skilled practice in those days when it was in existance.Those were the days when girls were married off fairly early, they were still shy, they wore simple dresses like pavadai and davani which generally covered most of the places where men would have loved to see. Suffice it to say, "girl seeing" was a ritual in itself with the prospective groom, his parents accompanied by an elder belonging to the generation earlier than the boy's father etc. went to see the girl at an appointed hour after consulting the astrologer for the right time and day.Thus the inspection party had atleast three generations to "view from all angles" and with different perspectives. I had the privilege of accompanying one such related party to "girl seeing" ceremony. Village Aunt fondly called "Ooru Athai" called me aside and told me the nuances of "girl seeing".

The aunt proceeded to narrate the details of things to be seen/checked in the process of seeing a girl. Great treatises such as Ananga Ranga by Kalyana Malla or Kamasutra by Vatsyayana paled into insignificance at the short and crisp narration of the art of "Girl Seeing" by "Ooru Athai". Suffice it to say, no visible part of the girl was left "untouched" by one or the other relatives of the boy in the process. The various aspects of scrutiny included the limbs, hair, gait, toes, the voice, hearing, sight, body odour, oral hygiene, knowledge of art, permanent physical disability of any part of the body(if any) etc.

While comfortaby seated, the girl's mother or some other elder generally called out to the girl to bring coffee or water as the case may be. The first round of inspection begins at this stage with all eyes popping out to see the emerging lady from the kitchen or the interiors of the house. This consists of watching for the gait of the girl which could be either "swan like" (anna nadai) or "elephant like"(aana nadai).

The girl is then advised to prostrate lady like before the elders. If she proceeds to where the elders are seated without help, her sight is not in doubt. This typical action involves bending on all fours before the elders with legs bent at the knees and head touching the ground with both her hands placed before her bowed head on the floor. The keen eyes of the boys party quickly looks for any missing toes or fingers or any extra gift from God of any of these body parts.

Some elders of the boy's party generally changes side to be with the girl for small talk. This action has to be carefully orchestered lest it seems suspicious. Three to four things are getting monitored with this action of the boy's party. Firstly, the tresses of the girl are caressed with the ulterior motive of checking for any shades of grey and to ensure that they are rooted to her head and not held by anything other than the roots!! The girl is then questioned in a very faint voice from a yard or away for some details of her upbringing. If the girl seeks a repeat of the question, she had it, as there is definitely something wrong with her hearing. Her answers reveal a little of the character/upbringin g of the girl. It could be brusque or suave or bland depending on several factors including whether she is a willing party to the whole process. The boy's party nearby also keeps their nostrils in high alert to notice any whiff of bad body odour. The next polite question to the girl is from close proximity to check her breath!! This is vintage breath analyser!!!

Finally, the girl has to be asked to display her prowess in fine art. This could be a vocal carnatak music or dance. The music will reveal whether there is melody in her voice or her voice resembles the sound produced when empty coconut shell is grated against a rocky surface! The dance reveals her prowess at nimble movements of her body which generally leaves the boy sleepless on the night of "Girl Seeing".

sunkan

I just hate this seeing business. It is like how cows were chekced before buying. It is total discrimination. Good this custom is slowly dying.

kala